I can still see the scars
From where I cut and burned myself
There dark circles around my eyes
My lips are chapped
My knuckles are bruised
And my cheeks are hollowed out
This is not beautiful

I sleep on your side of the bed
I look at our old pictures
I walk the paths we used to
Hand in hand together
And smoke pack after pack of cigarettes
To keep the taste of you on my tongue
This is not romantic

Anger is crawling up my throat
Trying to find an escape
Depression is seeping into my bones
Crushing me with it’s weight and desperation
Anxiety is crippling so much
That even the thought of speaking out loud causes me to panic
This is not poetic

Pain is not beauty
Heartbreak is not romantic
Mental illness is not poetic
If you want the hell
That you call quirks
Have mine
I can’t live with them anymore

I tried desperately
To break down your walls
Pounding my ****** fist
Yelling
Let me in, let me in
I can take away the hurt
If you would just let me IN
But really
I'm just asking softly
As tears form in my eyes
And I will keep knocking
Until the skin on my knuckles
Is ripped
The flesh is bleeding
And you can see the bone
I won't stop
Even if my wrist breaks
I won't stop
Until I break down your walls

Its not about Destiny making a
choice.
Its all about our choice making a Destination.

I honestly don't want to
Erase you from my mind
Or my lips
Or my fingertips