Gotta get the engine blocks
painted on the lawn
Gotta get the derelict wrecks
rearranged, by dawn
The ol double wide, re-sided
redo the roof, and shingles
Hell, she even wants
the sound of X-mas jingles
It's that time of year
here, in redneck land
Family coming to town
squattin a month, their plan
The yearly escapades
my dear love makes me do
a white trash decorating thing
she says
"or there's no sex, for you"

:D~ Mamma aint happy, aint nobody happy...
NRA

Hell,
We don't need no goddamn gun control, Jewboy.
If you don't like the United States,
Why don't you sell your Mercedes,
Buy and Uzi,
And go to Tel-Aviv.
We don't need your kind 'round here no more.

The goddamn eggheads have been running this country too long.
That's why we like Trump.
He ain't one of them.
We relate better to someone
Who doesn't use his mind.

I know you think
That pimping off your sister,
Becky,
Is the best way to help your Family get out of Debt,
But I'm sorry, Jethro,
She just ain't my type of gal.
I think that you think
That my refusal to have sex with your sister
Is evidence of my homosexual tendencies.
From your warped perspective,
If I don't want to have sex
With a girl with a body like your sister,
I must be a Pussy
Or, at least, a Wimp,
But I'm sorry, Jethro,
Your sister, Becky,
Just ain't my type of gal.
You probably think that I ain't earning any money.....
That I have to borrow from my Daddy
Just to afford the chili  I eat for  Lunch,
But This has nothing to do with the price your asking
For your sister's sexual services, Jethro.
She just
Ain't my type of gal.

People keep writing.
I don't know why the hell why?
They ain't got much new to say,
If you ask me.
They just say it in different ways.

Sloppin the hog
huntin the dog
Yo there redneck, my lady is fine
Huntin the dog
sloppin the hog
I don't make trouble, most o the time
Sloppin the hog
huntin the dog
She drives me crazy with all o her moves
Huntin the dog
sloppin the hog
I ain't lazy, sliding o'ver her grooves
Sloppin the hog
huntin the dog
Burying my bone, drinkin moonshine
Hair of the dog
sloppin the hog
Flavour stuck on me, like essence of pine
Sloppin the hog
hair of the dog
Early in morn, to rise and shine
Hair of the dog
sloppin the hog
Peeing air freshener, burnin a line
Sloppin the hog
hair of the dog
All thanks to God, I didn't go blind
Peeing green fog
burnin my log
Sinning all night, drinkin spoiled moonshine
Hair of the dog
sloppin the hog
Burnin my log
peeing green fog

This, is not funny :D much...

Say your prayers, Jewboy!
You ain't no match
For people like Us.
Our Lord, Jesus Christ,
Told us that there shouldn't be no Homos
And that women shouldn't be having no sex,
Except with a husband,
But Jesus didn't say nothing about
"Environmentalism".
All this stuff about Gaia being the Living Earth
Is for those Paganistic Pansies, Jewboy.
It don't mean nothing to us.

I asked my Stock Broker if I could
Invest in a Genocide fund.
He responded, "Excuse me?"
I told him that I felt
That I could profit a great deal from Mass Murder.
He understood me and agreed.
"Sir, if you want to Invest in Genocide,"
"I would suggest that you invest in diverse sectors of the Economy."
"There are a lot of ways to kill people, you know?"
This nerd was talkin' my language now!
I was gonna' invest in killin' people"
And get rich doin' it!
It would be like
Killin' two birds with one stone.

I ain't really crazy bein' crazy.
Hell,
I've been crazy for a LONG time,
But I ain't REALLY crazy.
It's the Psychiatrist who are crazy.
That's why they keep prescribing me all those pills.
Me....
As long as I got my gun,
My dog
And my Bible,
I'm just fine.
Just don't try to tell me what to do!

I ain't gonna' lie to you
I'll make a killin' off of killin'
If I can.
Why the Hell not?!
It's been goin' on since Cain and Abel.
So it says  in the Good Book.
If people are gonna' be killin' each other,
Might as well make money off of it.
Right?
Gotta' make room for all those new little babies bein' born
Even if they're just gonna' be the next ones
Who  get killed.
Most people
Actually  enjoy murder
A heck of a lot more than sex.
If want sex from my wife,
She'll push me away,
But,
If I give her some money to go on a shopping spree,
She's say,
"Thank, dear!"
So,
I try to please the Woman.
Why the Hell not?!
I believe in Femianism.
People been killin' each other
Since the Beginning of Time.
I just make it easier for them to do it.
Middle East,
Far East,
Northeast.
Wherever the Hell the Bastards want to Kill Each Other,
I help 'em out.
I don't feel any sort of Guilt.
I sleep as peacefully as a Python.
As a matter of fact,
Sometimes,
I sleep WITH my Python,
Bertha,
Sure, I make sure she's well fed
So she don't eat me,
But I kind of like that slippery feeling
Of her skin against my skin.
It might be some sort of a sexual fetish.
I don't know?
I ain't seen no psychiatrist yet.

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