im sinking down
To a place where i hang out
when no ones around
where the birds fly, maybe soar
a memoir of yore
when i used to lay on the floor
and imagine an upside down world.
Where people jump in and out of doors
and balance on beams nd round the bend they twirl
Overdone masculinity rules this world but in mine it twas a girl
No sides were taken, no war, no fight. and she was black
History moves forward and you cannot take anything back
when i look back to back i tend to think we have two faces
the breath is being lost and we've all gone missing in our paces
I want to evolve my system but there is no racing
I want to speak and there is only facing
No missing, just placing
until our spirits are interlacing
towards one envisioned nation

you cut the brown boy
into two lines while i roll a dollar bill
you're telling me about how i should let you shoot up
just once
so you can know what it's like.
i loved the way ****** tasted, the way it felt sitting in my nose.
unlike blow or pills, you don't let it drain into your throat
it just sits there
and pushes into you.
you cut the brown boy
and when we snort it it tastes like sugar
sweeter than the coke cut with B12 that had me up all night
and i can taste it all over my body
like the sour sweet is pacing through my body to the beating of my heart
i feel it in my arms
i feel it in my nose
i feel it between my legs.
i felt so warm, and then i was on top of you.
kissing on your neck and grinding on your lap, i can feel your heartbeat and it is so
s
l
o
w.
the sun is setting outside
and your skin is ignited with the orange flame.
you taste like cherries and cucumbers and ******.
the warmth is even brighter when you are inside of me,
i am holding you so close that i'm scared if we go still we will just
melt into each other.
"i love you
i love you
i love you" we whisper back and forth;
you grip my hands while i ***

we're outside for a cigarette in your car
we're going to go buy some molly in a city far away
your eyelids are still sagging
and everything is still so slow
i can see the yellow of the nicotine in the smoke.

i am overcome with grief and guilt every time i wash my hands
because i do not know how much of you is left in the fine lines of my palms