i would rather be stung by 14 highly venomous jellyfish than be constantly reminded of you
i would rather cut off part of my foot during an imagined spider attack while sleeping than have to see your name again on facebook
i would rather have my jaw become stuck open while about to take a bite of a sandwich than get your phone number
i would rather be coughed on by perez hilton than see you again
inspiration drawn from steve roggenbuck and wikipedia