Heated tongues had no temperance to spare

Betrayal is a fickle master cloaked in innocence

Eyes held truths with no regards to context

Illusions were never more real that when piercing
The heart left to bleed pounding desperately on the floor
Under the foot of merciless pain

How do you explain the inexplicable?

Some things just end while others start

The resoning was perfectly logical
But ****** if anyone could see it

Off they went onto seperate trajectories
Only to find tge truth revealed in 20 years of wastedness

Because faith seemed a too bigger thing
To hold through this broken prism

It was only when they travelled around it in oposite motions
They could see they belonged together

Far too late,  as other sattlites they collected were now in the way

And faith seemed once again bigger to hope for

And not a thing was learnt.

Your eyes keep outlining the shape of your desires

Transposed on to my body

Watching you watching me

No secret, im left exposed

Vulnerabilities exploited

with a mere flicker of the eye

Primed eyes locked

Its the moment

Flight or fight

Zeroed in on my waist,

a triangulation of anticipated pleasures

Eyes drawn up,
the signal fire is lit

a flourish of your jacket like a bullfight

Swaggering towards me

arm raised in another flicker

the resounding crack of a slap breaking

broke the air

Fear panic and dread.

frozen.

And yet,  the kiss left

was soft warm and gentle

Weaving the shape of a homely warmth

that as soon you broke away

left a chasm so cold

i was driven to clamour for it

Only for a second though,

You know what a stubborn ***** i am.

Admitting it was never an option.

Even with my breath in your mouth.

Still when asked what i felt

You know my reply.


First draft

Your eyes keep outlining the shape of your desires

Transposed on to my body

Watching you watching me

No secret, im left expised

Vulnerabilities exploites with a mere flicker of the eye

Primed eyes locked

Its the moment

Flight or fight

Zeroed in on my waist a triangulation of anticipated pleasures

Eyes drawn up the signal fire is lit a flourish of your jacket like bullfight

Swaggering towards me arm raised in flicker the resounding crack of a slap breaking broke the air

Fear panic and dread frozen

And yet the kiss left was soft warm and gentle

Weaving the shape of a homely warmth that as soon you broke left a chasm so cold i was driven to clamour or your warmth

Only for a second though,

You know what a stubborn ***** i am.

Admitting it was never an option.

Even with my breath in your mouth.

...
Head cupped gently in hands,
rested on her scraped knees.
Gently rocking away
the latest break
in the fabric of her equilibrium
...
Three deep breaths,
a final tear travels the curves of her face
Slipping into the crevices of her lips
A taste of the salt that sustains and drives her
...
Three deep breaths,
a pause and the arch of her neck
drags her head skywards
the blurry clouds and foggy mememories
blend into resolve
...
Three deep breaths,
Arms release shoulders drop,
its time.
...
Three deep breaths,
she slides up the wall
her diamond eyes focused
on a point of light
...
Three deep breaths,
She thrusts herself off
the comforting wall
...
Fists like anchors,
she pulls up the life from the ground
...
One deep breath,
she screams in the name of her reserection
...
Broken in all the right places,
off she walks like a queen
Loving her pain...

Heart beats flicker in and out of time at the mention of your name and modify  the energy equation to leap mountains in your presence
the peace and clam tangled with a rushing river of emotions
defying the well accustomed laws of time nature and space

I glow
you beam
the closer we get the more harmonized our rhythms of life
one beats in the others silence

eyes locked in some strange ethereal fequence transmit confessions that won't dare slip from trembling lips
suspended in space and time the moment seeps into forever endless revolutions of highs and lows all this missing and longing translated into a mass relief

shedding our skins melding into one beautiful energy crested by a haloed aura a molten wave of dexterity with delicate flourishes and playful and graceful splashes of color mass and light moving through moods and finally settling to coalesce in the tranquil of home

suddenly ripped apart by those who insist on living in the finite realms of life

you were once again so beautiful, and once again feel emptier than the last time the void took over
At least If we can't have now
we will always have forever

ever waiting
yours sincerely love.

Feelings rusharound my body provoking the thoughts in my head.
The struggle to delineate right from wrong bares down on me like a heavy, dark shadow carrying the weight of my misgivings. Am i tool furthering destructive programming from big brother? Or a hapless dreamer looking for silverlinings in the dark ?
From divided love and loyalties,  I swing a pedulum of frustration and anxiety one minute and stop laguudly into apathy the next. Perception and point of views have too many depths to dive. Each one a murky abyss offering nothing but the promise of enduring mystery.
I throw my hands up,
and still get shot anyway
I show the colour of my beliefs and  I AM labelled a facist
I fight for my freedom and am labelled a racist
I respond to hatred with contempt and I am held incontempt!
I fight a war that i never started and found myself left to my own devices.
The enemy laughs as it uses our enlightenment against us.
Delusional we think we're winning
Propaganda machine doest sleep always on a 24 hour need to know basis.
I stole love and I withheld it
I cried poor and never meant it
The vice in my hand told me to do it
What happens now?

Sifting through the foul garbage of my mind,
Icaught a glimpse of shimmering light,
I dug deeper and found more still,
I scavenged and I raked
A desperate mood suddenly hung over me
I start clawing like madness
The more I scraped the deeper it got buried
The deeper I searched,
The more I was emerged in rank
Swallowed up once again by that glimmer of hope
That was once aptly named You.

I'm still digging myself out...
When will I learn?