I learned when I was
fifteen that I could make men
fall in love with me.

I learned that I could
control someone solely on
the bulge in their pants.

I learned that sometimes
people don't fall in love with
personality.

I learned how to break
someone's heart without looking
them right in the eye.

I learned when I was
fifteen that I knew more than
I should know about this.

I want a woman to scour
& beat me with flowers
for hours to tower my
tightened empowerment
delighted by sight
at what hasn't been sighted
i'd be delighted if just for a night
you'd sit right by side
but that hasn't been quite yet decided
for a while sit tight and at night fight the silence
the silence of quiet excitement / be frightened
but don't be afraid of my plight
be delighted
i want to crawl all of your ribs
count your bites
i tried twice to fly right by your mind
to entice it
but tonight I just write to
make bright on my mind
on my mind you shine brightly
in my mind you're like lightening
and kindly I'm blinded
your beauty is blinding
I'd like to rewind
to remind
and remind
and remind
and remind you

Recently life has been nothing more,
Than fleeting moments dragging me under.
And you're what my thoughts turn to
When I'm sad,
Do you bring this downcast or a small glimmer of hope,
Simply enough to keep me from burning down?
But.
I love you, maybe I just love the thought of you.
No I love you.
But I can't say it.
That's why,
I'm putting it in this pathetic poem that no one's gonna read,
That's why,
I'm a pathetic person that no one's gonna need.
I look at you but you can't see me,
Try a little harder,
I simply need a favor
Can you keep this between you and me?
Because I'm just a pathetic person that no one's gonna need.
This was my attempt to get it all out on paper,
But this is just a screen.

i'm tired
i'm tired
i'm tired
i'm so ******* tired
**tired

When he says he wants a family
and I say I want everything is it
too much to pluck the moon from
the sky and carry it in my back pocket?
Rather than his hand there I like
the feeling of not being pregnant
I like hot air balloon rides and
sinking into the earth after rain
when he talks about the future
it's a pie chart and a clearly labeled
and concisely drawn graph and
when I talk about my dreams
in the morning they are vapors
and LSD my words mean absolutely
nothing I weigh less than a slice of
bread mostly meaning happens in
between things or when I hear Paul
Simon whispering lightning in my ear.

*Our children would be green-eyed monsters

my pages are shaking like
timid dry leaves on
a brisk Autumn morning
I am a book heavy
with unspoken words
piled beneath countless others
a couple stains and a weak spine
it's hard to hold all the stories together
sometimes I'll find a page out of order
that someone's ripped out and
rearranged
The stories are getting shorter and shorter
losing pages throughout and

so much depends
upon

a red wheel
barrow

glazed with rain
water

beside the white
chickens