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Stephanie Carlson  Apr 2011
Free
I hope you know I'm lying
When I whisper I'm okay
I'll tell everyone I'm fine
No need to worry anyone
But the pictures in my mind
Say the paim has just begun
Painted heavily
With reds, blacks and your name
Twisted images filled with shades of gray

You make me wonder what would become
If I were just to fade
Watch the light fade from my eyes
Slowly slip from my disguise
Parade into the afterlife
Press a little harder with this knife

Seeing your picture on my wall
Makes me question living at all
If nothing matters and I'm not worth it
As everyone agrees
I will give up on everything
As I fall upon my knees

Here's to the pain you left behind
And the way he persists
These words have scared them I guarentee
But they'll make me stronger
Like these cuts and the way I bleed
Just wait, wait and see

You may have killed me but
Only I can set me free
DC raw love Feb 2015
he fronted his happiness
as he hurt inside

he hid his tears
with a smile

when was in pain
he would laugh

he hid under his pillow
for days on end

he would sneak, early in the morning,
to eat, fearful of others
yet he lived alone

he shot his father
20 years ago
and his father forgave him

loved ones would tell him
your very much loved

this man was my best friend
he was a true genius

honestly, he was not far
behind Gates and Jobs

he tried killing himself
multable times

he started to see a shrink
and the day came

he was sitting, waiting, ontime
an hour had past

so he decided to go for a walk
an deliberately walk in front of a
fully loaded dump truck

to end his paim
that he could not overcome
he was my very good friend
V  Dec 2017
B R (O.K) E N
V Dec 2017
My mother taught me neglect
And my father taught me fear,
It's not something you can just "forget",
The source of my paim seems clear;
It tastes like love but it is not ,
I am one who has forgot,
To know what home is like and can be called,
It feels so real but sadly-it's false.
Childhood Trauma

— The End —