Submit your work, meet writers and drop the ads. Become a member


Andy KittySmasher
Pittsburgh    Just waiting to call myself, my own
Kitty Prr
Auckland, New Zealand.    I won't be coming on here anymore. I am going to become semi-reclusive. I will leave the account active with my existing posts.
107/Cisgender Female   


Oh, ye little kitty-girl, kitty-girl, kitty-girl,
Oh, ye little kitty-girl, why do ye purr?
Ye, champagne and roses,
A bag full of poses,
Oh, ye little kitty-girl, that's why you purr!

Oh, ye little kitty-girl, kitty-girl, kitty-girl,
Oh, ye little kitty-girl, why do ye purr?
From London to Denver,
you're glowing my ember,
Oh, ye little kitty-girl, that's why you purr!

Oh, ye little kitty-girl, kitty-girl, kitty-girl,
Oh, ye little kitty-girl, why do ye purr?
I know that you're fluffy,
You're cute and you're puffy
Oh, ye little kitty-girl, that's why you purr!

Oh, ye little kitty-girl, kitty-girl, kitty-girl,
Oh, ye little kitty-girl, why do ye purr?
The sun is a-shining,
The silver a-lining,
Oh, ye little kitty-girl, that's why you purr!

Oh, ye little kitty-girl, kitty-girl, kitty-girl,  
Oh, ye little kitty-girl, why do ye purr?
The moon is a-gleaming
For you I’m now dreaming,
Oh, ye little kitty-girl, that's why you purr!

Oh, ye little kitty-girl, kitty-girl, kitty-girl,  
Oh, ye little kitty-girl, why do ye purr?
So, come ye, and take me
For you will not fake me,
Oh, ye little kitty-girl, that's why you purr!

Oh, ye little kitty-girl, kitty-girl, kitty-girl,
Oh, ye little kitty-girl, why do ye purr?
I love you, my kitten,
So put on your mitten,
Oh, ye little kitty-girl, that's why you purr!
The melody used for the poem was from an Austrian folk song, called "Oh, du lieber Augustin", presumably composed by a Viennese balladeer named Marx Augustin in 1679, though written documents date back to about 1800. The folk songs "The More We Get Together" and "Fat Turkeys" were all based on this song.
Daniel James Feb 2011
Somewhere between the age of 12 and 13
Kitty became a make up queen
Each time she turned up at the door
She’d more make up on than before
Her parents could not figure out why
She slapped it on, she piled it high
From orange ears to blue shaded eyes
From red lips to black butterflies
After a while her poor little face
Had more layers to it than a wedding cake
So she made some changes to her routine
Got up each day at four fifteen
Skipped breakfast, hopped in and out the shower
Which left, for make up, a mere three hours
This worked well for a little while
Until a teacher remarked she’d lost her smile
At which point in her heart she knew
She’d need an extra hour or two
To don her make up every day.
So she started arriving at school quite late
At nine at first, but soon midday
Light’s nice at that time anyway.

Then one day, a rather dashing lad
Offered to help her carry her bags.
Now Kitty thought he’d cussed her eyes,
So she slapped him and ran home to revise
Her make up routine, before she cried
And ruined her mascara.

Now this rather dashing handsome lad
Could not help feeling he’d been had
He stood there red as blush itself
And swore he’d fall for someone else.

Kitty meanwhile, back at home
Was swotting up on her skin tone
And trying every shade of white
To hide the scars of sleepless nights.
“I’ll teach that lad, that dashing lad –
I’ll be something he has to have
He’ll want me so much he’ll carry my bags
With weights in them that break his back!!!”
And with a slightly evil laugh,
Her plan was made, the die were cast.

We rejoin Kitty five days on
After a five day make up marathon
Her skin-tone matched, her bags are gone
Except her school bag, which weighs a tonne –
But at the school gate, something’s wrong
Hang on, where is everyone?
Oh Kitty, Kitty, oh Kitty cakes
That is an embarrassing mistake
You’re not early, they’re not late –
You’ve come to school on a Saturday!

Ablush with embarrassment and all alone
Kitty’s mascara ran all the way home
And all the foundations and eye-shadow pens
Couldn’t put Kitty together again.
But just at the corner before her own street
Outside the corner shop, who should she meet?
But the boy, not the boy, the rather dashing young lad
Who was sat on the fence by the shop looking sad
Looking sad, looking blue, looking ever so glum
Like it wasn’t that long since he last ****** his thumb.

At first as their paths crossed they were both destined
Not to look in each other’s direction
But luckily old cupid used light and reflections
To swap left and right with two moment's intersecton
The arrow was fired, the sightline was true,
Said the boy, "What a perfectly red shade are you!
Without your mascara, without those lips too -
You look even hotter than you usually do!"

"Am I bovverred?" Said Kitty, looking bothered as could be.
"Well you do look a bit bovvered if I’m honest," said he.
"Well I am a bit bovvered if I’m honest," said she.

"Why don’t we make up and then I’ll walk you home?"
"Then we can hang out and we won’t be alone"
"I’ll give you the pin to my blackberry phone"
"We’ll sync up our wardrobes and match our skin tones"
"I’ll friend you on Facebook". "I’ll call you at night".
"I’ll take you nice places." "I’ll treat you right nice."
“You will”, said Kitty? "I will," said he,
“But first let me start my repeating my offer
To carry your school bag if you can’t be bovvered.”
“My school bag said Kitty,” repeating the offer
“To carry one of my school bags if I can’t be bothered?”

Now this time, Kitty had understood right
So she took off one of her school bags, and put it down by her side
“Long story, don’t ask…” She said with a pout,
And she gave him one, of her bags, once she took the weights out.
Emma Feb 2015
There once was a small black kitten
Who was relocated to a new place
Gone were the days of running with her friends
Here, no one knew her face
She walked around a parking lot
Looking for people during the day
But everyone else already had someone
With whom they liked to play
One day, while walking on the sidewalk
She met two new creatures
What she didn't know was that these two
Would become her greatest teachers
Kitty was a senior cat
Who'd help any lost soul
She was brave, sweet, and kind
And had a motherly role
A Fox stood beside Kitty
Running and jumping around
With piercing blue eyes and lots of energy
He spoke with a foreign sound
He was going on and on about the world
And couldn't seem to stop talking
This kitten couldn't keep her eyes off him
She was even intrigued by his walking
Later that night she went home
And was sitting in her bed
She thought Kitty was nice and so was Fox
She couldn't believe what they said
A few weeks later, she admitted to herself
She really liked Fox a lot
Even though she barely knew him
It was a crush she had got
She told Kitty and Kitty smiled
Saying she knew this would be true
Kitty suggested to get closer to him
The kitten should try something new
So the kitten and Fox went to a convention
And all was going great
Until suddenly, out of nowhere
Came someone the kitten would hate
It was the parrot who had followed her
And would never leave her alone
He'd fly around, pestering her
In his very annoying tone
The kitten tried to run behind Fox
But he had disappeared
She was stuck alone with the parrot
Something she always feared
Eventually she found Fox again
But the parrot continued to stay
The kitten decided she'd had enough
And told Fox about it the next day
He said he'd help protect the kitten
From the parrot looking for romance
And then mentioned he was excited
For the upcoming dance
Kitty offered to take the kitten
To the dance in three weeks
They worked on making the kitten beautiful
And keeping her away from the freaks
By the time the dance came around
The kitten was feeling brave
Kitty stood beside her, just in case
It was the kitten she needed to save
The kitten found the bravery
To be with Fox during a song
He looked so handsome, while the kitten thought
She was probably doing something wrong
When the parrot suddenly swooped in
The kitten got scared of this
But Kitty pushed the kitten into Fox
And then began to hiss
"What the heck just happened?"
Kitten asked Fox, confused
"I'm not entirely sure, but I know
I don't think I'm amused"
Later that night, the kitten decided
That one month from that night
She'd show Fox something she wrote
About how he can be her light
She read it to him a few weeks later
And for the first time, she got a hug
She feared he'd just look at the poem
Think it's bad, and just shrug
A few days later, Kitty had surgery
After she hurt her paw
The kitten and Fox went to comfort her
She gave the kitten looks of awe
Even when hurt, Kitty remembered
How much the kitten cared for him
He was pretty clueless, though
When it came to romance, he was dim
Kitty encouraged the kitten
To go out with him when she could
Thinking eventually he'd reveal his feelings
Or at least, he should
The kitten continued to be with Fox
And eventually he realized
Instead of just a simple friend
He saw a companion in her eyes
Eventually he told the kitten he loved her
But her kitten brain couldn't process
How Fox could be in love with her
And how he could confess
Kitty said she was so innocent
And explained he truly cared
The kitten still was incredibly confused
And just a little scared
It took her a month to realize
That he truly cared
He'd always stay by her side
Wipe away her tears when he can
When she was chased by an evil chihuahua
Beside her, he ran
He let her rest her head on him
She found someone she could trust
Putting their front paws together
He wouldn't leave her in the dust
Two weeks later, they booped noses
And eventually shared a kiss
But once again, the parrot returned
He was very jealous of this
The parrot wouldn't leave the kitten alone
And Kitty was in a fight with another
The parrot kept screeching all the time
That her and Fox shouldn't be together
But the kitten stayed with her true love
Through the good times and the bad
She'd comfort him when he was sick
He'd cheer her up when she's sad
One day, the kitten was in an accident
She had fallen off a bus
Fox had told her she shouldn't go near it
She didn't understand all the fuss
But instead of saying I told you so
Fox cuddled with her instead
Even though her back paw was broken
And she practically looked dead
She continued to read him poems
He'd write her some too
She cared for him so deeply
This was something new
But once again, the parrot returned
Saying they were meant to be
But the kitten knows things will be alright
Even if it isn't clear to see
She doesn't know much about the future
But she wants to keep her Fox
Even though he'll be far away
And she can't stuff him in a box
For now, she holds him close to her
And feels like the luckiest kitten
With strong feelings and a stronger bond
She truly is smitten
Who would have thought a small black kitten
Notorious for bad luck
Would cross paths with an amazing fox
With prosperity, she was struck
She can hold him close to her heart
And say she loves him so
This is the most amazing creature
She's ever come to know
Even if the days may not always be good
She knows she can count on this
She has the most amazing relationship with her fox
Bound with a true love's kiss.