11-6-14 I saw my name on your contacts list and wondered how many times your finger hovered over the "call" button. --- I hope you, or at least someone thinks at least some things about me are cute the way my hair sticks up and then flops over when I try to fix it and, when pinned up, the way it becomes gradually messier over the course of the day. When I mouth the words to a song on the school bus, scrunching my eyes and headbanging, or when I spin around on my heels, and try to look graceful. --- Frick, I shouldn't try to write about love, i'm just a thirteen-year-old girl who grew up on the internet and doesn't care about the ****** music she's listening to.
WELL I APOLOGIZE FOR BEING INSECURE I APOLOGIZE FOR WISHING TO HEAR SOMETHING THAT I HONESTLY FIND HARD TO BELIEVE FFS I KNOW I'M ANNOYING AND I KNOW I'M CLINGY AND I KNOW I CARE WAY TO MUCH ABOUT SOMEONE WHO DOESN'T CARE BACK I APOLOGIZE FOR HAVING A HEART THE SIZE OF THE MOON I APOLOGIZE THAT YOU TOOK A SPACE SHIP AND LEFT YOUR MARK ON IT! I APOLOGIZE FOR WANTING FOR ONCE IN A LONG TIME TO FEEL LIKE SOMEONE ACTUALLY CARES I APOLOGIZE FOR WANTING TO TALK TO YOU FOR MORE THEN TEN MINUTES I APOLOGIZE FOR CARING I APOLOGIZE FOR WANTING TO HEAR WHAT YOU HAVE TO SAY I APOLOGIZE FOR HANGING OFF YOUR WORDS BECAUSE I FIND THEM AMAZING I APOLOGIZE FOR MESSAGING YOU A COUPLE TIMES IN A ROW BECAUSE NO ONE ELSE TAKES THE TIME TO EVEN LOOK INTO MY HEART AND CARE WHAT I THINK I APOLOGIZE FOR CARING ABOUT YOUR OPINION I APOLOGIZE FOR WANTING A STRAIGHT ANSWER FOR ONCE INSTEAD OF UP AND DOWN ROLLER COASTER **** WHERE ONE DAY YOU MAKE ME THINK YOU CARE THEN THE NEXT IGNORE ME LIKE IM A ******* BEE IN YOUR EAR. I APOLOGIZE FOR ALWAYS BEING THE FIRST TO MESSAGE YOU I APOLOGIZE FOR PRETENDING TO NOT BE HURT WHEN YOU GIVE ME ONE WORD RESPONSES I APOLOGIZING FOR KNOWING YOU HAVE DEPRESSION AND KNOWING IT SOMETIMES EFFECTS YOU BUT I CANT TAKE NOT KNOWING IF I AM JUST A BOTHER I APOLOGIZE I NOTICE WHEN YOU DROP AWAY LIKE A BIRD SHOT OFF A TELEPHONE LINE I APOLOGIZE FOR GIVING A **** AND FEELING LIKE MAYBE JUST ******* MAYBE YOU MIGHT FEEL THE SAME I APOLOGIZE FOR NOT BEING WHAT YOU WANT I APOLOGIZE FOR ASSUMING YOU HAVE OTHERS BUT WITH MY PAST HOW COULD I NOT?!?! I APOLOGIZE FOR SEEING HINT TRACES OF COMPASSION IN YOU THAT MAKES ME FALL HEAD OVER HEELS FOR YOU I APOLOGIZE FOR NOT BEING OKAY EVERY DAY I APOLOGIZE FOR NOT ALWAYS KNOWING WHAT TO SAY OR HOW TO SAY WHAT I WANT TO SAY I APOLOGIZE FOR CARING. I APOLOGIZE FOR WANTING TO READ MORE INTO YOU I APOLOGIZE FOR WANTING TO KNOW THE REAL YOU I APOLOGIZE FOR WANTING TO GET BEHIND YOUR MASK I APOLOGIZE FOR READING INTO THE SIGNS WRONG BUT THEY LOOK LIKE A FOREIGN LANGUAGE. I APOLOGIZE FOR BEING HUMAN AND LASTLY I APOLOGIZE FOR APOLOGIZING FOR WHAT I DIDN'T DO WRONG.
I wrote this because I realized I was apologizing for wars I didn't start.