The Great Niagra Falls
Spilling over like my love
loose and reckless
alive and fruitful

And having found a source
an outlet for this outpouring love
this deep inborn desire to say 'yes'
with all of me; my life

This thick lust for life
and for love
and this perfect intuition
to give it all away

I am proud to be alive.
And to have the capacity
in my bones and in my flesh
to say 'yes' with all of me

So small and so fragile
yet having existed forever.

Nonetheless, impermanent, I am.
Here to make a permanent mark
with this pen and this paper
and this racing heart
so uniquely my own
and so beautifully similar to the rest.

All here through the great devotional
journey of our ancestors
so gladly outpouring life,
like the great Niagra Falls
Into the present moment,
into our hands

And so,
I pick up this pen
and I write.

Bundled up, and stomping through
arctic white snow, listening
to the Love Below. I look
out on the Maid of the Mist,
the air surrounds my cold cheeks,
numbs them like an icy kiss.

Who could truly be so dumb,
brave those falls in a barrel
run? Ripley’s has me unnerved
believe it or not, the same
nervous rush I feel, before
the ***** from a booster shot.

Then after awhile, we are off
to dine in neon towers, where
we spend hours, soaking
in the bath of a night-time
sky. The glint of flush colors
reflecting against buildings.

The sounds of water raging
amidst mouthfuls of moonlight,
it looks like the world’s been staged.
But back to rest in a spiral
hotel, it’s been a lively day;
Where we pull up the covers,
and that’s where we will remain.

oo put dis paintin on me walls
me gona find out eider way
me gona drive to niagra falls
to find out who ruined me walls

rip bing bing pop, ****** come in on line 1
no not extension 1, line 1, no wonder they call u
******

ey ***** me say to me wife
dis be yor stupid paintin,
no steve it aint (read double life)
******* dis be ugly anyways
sorry steve, shush *****,
u no i turned reggae
me name aint steve anymor
call me steve one more time
and il shove a lawnmor up ur ***,
its reggae mon not steve  


rip bing bing pop, ****** come in on line 1
no not extension 1, line 1, no wonder they call u
******

johny johny, "yes papa"?
did u put dis tin on me walls?
"no papa", telling alie?
"no papa", close your eyes
smack! dont put any tin
on me walls *******!
sorry papa it wasn't me
shut up, smoke a splif *******

rip bing bing pop, ****** come in on line 1
no not extension 1, line 1, no wonder they call u
******

hoo could ave put dis ting on me walls?
maby is me smoke me a splif
me will remember if me did it or not
but me out of rolling papers
and me left me ganga in me rig

rip bing bing pop, ****** come in on line 1
no not extension 1, line 1, no wonder they call u
******

me left me rig at me work
me boss dont no ow to twerk
me boss tink she no ow to twerk
no wan wants to break da news
me just a shy island boy
still confused bout de paintin

rip bing bing pop, ****** come in on line 1
no not extension 1, line 1, no wonder they call u
******

love reggae
love ganga
love art
love poetry

The topic for today's selection

Is how to deal with your *******

The price is high to get a thrill

But, it comes in a small blue pill

If your private will not shoot

Or, your soldier won't salute

There's an answer from a lab

That comes to you in a small blue tab

If you have poor self esteem

This pill could just fulfill your dreams

If your pecker seems to wilt

This will give your kilt a tilt.

So, if your manhood is slightly flaccid

Like the waters of Lake Placid

One small pill will make a diff

It won't take long and you'll be stiff

It works deep down on your projection

And points it in the right direction

It helps the package in your trousers

And makes the women all say "wowsers!"

They tried a cream, now that is gone

They couldn't get their work gloves on

They say it works and really fast

And helps to make your love life last

Your girl will love it, that's the goal

For now you've got a brand new pole

Dr. Frankenstein, he brought life

But, no excitement for his wife

She wanted more than he could give

The Doctor's "Monster" didn't live

They say don't drink it with a beer

The side effects are ones I fear

They say that if your BP drops

There's chances that your heart could stop

And should it last for say....4 hours

You should take some cold, cold, showers

Then, if it's still petrified,

I guess...go take it for a ride

Apparently, when it's like this

It makes it really hard to ****

But, if this pill should make it stand

Don't go waste it in your hand

Don't buy generic, at least not yet

For there's no telling what you'll get

It may stand up, it may lay down

It might just turn a dark, dark brown

Remember, it's to give you pride

And make your smile ten feet wide

It's not to ask "what's in my pocket"

"Well, dear it's shaped  like a rocket"

It's something to improve your life

And return enjoyment to your wife

For now that she knows this stuff works

You won't be wasting it on  jerks

You'll  be home where there's no pressure

And having *** at your own leisure

So now, I'll end with some advice

And I don't want to have to  tell you twice

The next time you go to NIagra

Take along a few ******!

Would you still love me if my sea blue green eyes were puddles of icky brown like gas station toilet water,
Would you still love me if my locks of autumn sun kissed hair follicles fell off my head like they do seasonally,
Would you love me if my skin was orange like bright cheeto puffed style, and would you still love me if I had no nose,
Would you still love me when I'm sad and unconsolable,
With tears running down my eyes like the waters off niagra,
Would you still love me if I died,
Like not existed anymore,
Would you even cry,
And would you love me if I had no value to this world,
If everyone hated me and ran from me like a squirrel, Would you still love this pathetic girl, If she was all that she set out to be but couldn't. Would you still love her like you do,
Would you love me for all my ugly faults I cannot change.

There is a war waging in my head- not of ammunition, but accusation.
Shouts and cries and threats. Screaming not bullets, but voices.
A war of words.
There is no peace in my head- no calm, no place of respite- only raging fords.
Mind like Niagra, falling, falling, empty and broken.
Not even sleep is really sleep any more, just another battleground.
Dead bodies scattered, A war of words.
A war of words.
There is a Cold War going on in my head, cold like the weather, cold like the rain.
The rain tastes sweet like my sanity;
but sanity is just another state of mind. Just like the river, it never quiets down.
The enemy is the successor and Niagra is falling down.
Bridges in London are falling down, only my fair lady is dressed in army fatigues.

Do Not Tell Me “everything will be okay”

I will not feel relief
my inside’s stress tsunamis don’t have an off button
they will catastrophically annihilate anything I believe to be
okay
I wish they didn’t
Oh fairy godmother, Oh yahweh, god, ******* jesus himself
grant me wishes, grant the whole ******* world wishes
because we’re tired
I can’t even imagine the fuel debt of starving african children
or stockholders losing what they haven’t bought yet
when I, a financially privileged and well fed college student
can’t get through 3 hours without trying to prevent
another stress tsunami

Do not tell me everything will be okay
It is not what i want to hear
I want to hear bullets in my head
girls, screaming at the sight of my right arm
gushing niagra falls of blood
I want god to **** my ****
I hope every therapist and so called good friend
can understand these words when i say
Depression will never be okay
Feeling hundred year old brick buildings
crushing upon my chest, my brain
ransacked by rubble
and my heart, an empty sack
will never be okay

I am burnt to a crisp
I am too old for this ****

Redundancy is ...
A ... Horrible  Thing ... !!!

But ...
Who are the ones ... ?
That Most ... FEEL THE STING ... ?!?

THOSE Who .... CONTROL ....
The Employment ... " Bullring " ... ?!?

Or THOSE Who Sit ... " Waiting " ....
With ....

NO BELL to RING .... !!!

For Whom Does The Bell ...
REALLY ... Toll ... ?

Give Me a ... " Drum Roll " ...
Before i'm ... REDUNDANT ...
and left in ... THE COLD ... !!!!!!

The Unions are ... DEAD ...
So Employers Now Get ...
to do ... WHAT THEY LIKE ... !!!
cos' ... Most youth are BRAINDEAD ... !!!

They Always ... ACT BOLD ...
But Do ... What They're ... TOLD ... !!!

Ask them about ... " Business " ...
Not ONE ... seems to know ... !?!
what happens to ... THEM ...
When Companies ... "FOLD" ... !!!

They QUICKLY Get ... KNOCKED ...
When The Ship Starts to ... " ROCK " ... !!!

But STILL .... Cannot see ....
How Corporates ... "PLOT" ...
To REMOVE .... Who they want ... !!!

Because THINKERS ... Will Question ...
The LOT that they've ... GOT ... ?!

While ... " Corporate Heads " ...
are Constantly ... DRIVEN ...

Agendas they have ...
Are Suitably ... "hidden" ...

You're told ...

"NOT TO QUESTION !" ...

That Act is ... FORBIDDEN ... !!!!

But Lives That ... They Lead  ...
Most People ... "AIN'T LIVIN " ... !!!!

I'm NOT .... " David Niven " ... !!!
but i'd like to play ... " BOND " ... !!!

So that I could ... " QUICKLY " ...
Put RIGHT ... All These WRONGS ... !!!

The WRONGNESS ... They do ...
" is hidden" ...................................................... from view ... !!!!

Meantime they sit ... "Planning" ...
and Constantly .... SCAMMING .... !!!
Which ... " CASH-DRIVEN YOUTH " ...
Should now join ... " Their Crew " ...

They look for a ... " FOOL" ...
Who REALLY ... AIN'T Cool ... !!!

To Push You ... Then STICK YOU ...
As if you're just ... " Glue " ...
That they can just ... STAMP ON ...
Until You Feel ... " BLUE " ... !!!

They walk in ... " NEW SHOES " ...
While yours are now due ...
For ... " Mending and Bending " ...
from ... " Cobblers Tools " ... !!!

Like FISH ...
We are ...  " Schooled " ...
Then thrown into ... " POOLS " ...
For ... Redundancy Marks ...
While surrounded by ... " SHARKS " ...
Who Have ... " Their Own Space " ...
In the ... " Office Car Park " ... !!!

My words may seem ... DARK ...
But This Is ...  NO LARK ... !!!

Redundancy's ... groWING ...
The REALITY'S .... " STARK " .... !!!

I'm ... " NOBODY'S DOG " ... !!!
But ... WATCH OUT For My BARK ... !!!!!

The Angels Now ... " HERALD " ...
and Sing to my ... HARK ... !!!

HARK ...
As in ... " CALL " ...

My stories ... AREN'T TALL ..... !!!
But I AM .... Of Course ... !!!

If You're NEEDING ... " MORE CLUES " ...
Try ... " Inspector Morse " ... !!!

Now ...
Those who won't hear me ...
Are on the ... " DOWNFALL " ... !!!

Like NIAGRA ....
They ... " FALL " ... !!!
with their backs to .... THE WALL ...

and Now ... CAN'T Afford ...
The Price of ... " The Stalls " ... !!!

Redundancy Payments ...
REALLY ... DON'T Last ...
UNLESS ... You were one ...
Of The ... "Corporate Class " ... !!!

But ... EVEN They Suffer ...
These words are now ... TRUE ... !!!

When They're ... Out of Work ...
TRUST ME ... They DON'T SHIRK ... !!!

They KNOW ... ALL ABOUT ...
The ... " BENEFIT ROUTE " ...
and then get ... The Council ...
to PAY FOR ... " Their House " ...  !!! ? !!!

But ...
NOT JUST ... " Your Average " ... !!!

They Think That's for ... SAVAGE ... !!!
The rental they're paying ...
Brings Taxpayers ... DAMAGE ... !!!!
because ... " BENEFIT FUNDS " ....

When for ... THEM ....
Just get ... " RAVAGED " ... !!!!!

This is ... " The Coup " ...
When Redundancy ... comes ...

But THIS is ... A Story ...
to give you ... Some Fun ...

I've just been ... " In The MIX " ...
of Redundancy ... TRICKS ... !!!

But ...
HERE'S How it went ...

SO .....
Follow This Script ... !!!

"We need volunteers !
New systems demand,
that certain positions
will now disappear !"

But when ... Volunteers Came ...
They Came ... " LIKE THE RAIN" ... !!!!!
and that put ... AN END ...
to ... " REDUNDANCY GAMES " ... !!!!!!

"We've had a rethink,
and don't need to shrink,
cos people have moved,
so everything's cool" ....

But ...
Here is ... " THE TWIST " ... !?!

My job is ... SECURE ... !!!
At LEAST ... for a year ...

But ...
Check THIS BIT HERE ... !!!

"Your role's been appraised"

and ....

to ... MY SURPRISE ...
From ... NOT Being needed ...

I got a .... PAY RISE ... ???? !!! ????

So Now You See ... WHY ...
A Brother like ... " I " ...
Will NEVER .... Put Trust ...
In THESE ... Corporate Guys ... !!!

Never Mind Their .... FORK TONGUES ....
What about their ... " SNAKE EYES " .... !???!

This thing is becoming ...
A ... Constant WORRY ....
for those of us ... Working ...

" REDUNDANCY ! " ...

The pavement glistens with it’s new top coat of shiny rain and she is driving back to school; back to too much noise and too many faces. I don’t want to go. I would give anything not to go. It happens then. I hear the impact first: metal pushing and crunching upon and into itself. The windshield gets closer and closer and in this moment it reminds me of a first kiss, but glass is inexperienced and uses too much tongue. I think I hear her say something. I am praying that she says something. She asks me if I’m okay. I feel dead and cold, and underaged corpse in the passengers’ seat. I say nothing. I hear her get out of the car to check on the woman who is screaming in the driver’s seat of her smashed vehicle. I feel warmth down my face that I assume are unwelcome tears, and open my frightened eyes to red. Red. And all I can think is ‘why have I not cried blood before?’ I open my mouth to say something, but end up tasting death. I blink my eyes more times than I need to. The windshield is cracked. She comes back to the car and keeps saying my name; a question. “Miranda? Miranda? Miranda?” the words I’m sorry cannot escape my mouth fast enough. The panic in her voice is undeniable. “Miranda? I’m calling the police sweetie, okay?” “I’m sorry.” “Don’t be sorry, it’s going to be okay.” “I’m so sorry Allison.” I can hear blood rushing from my head like Niagra Falls and I cup my hands to catch it. There is so much of it and it is burning my fingertips and all I can say is “I’m sorry.” I’m trying not to think of god right now, but I can’t help it. I will never capitalize that word again. I can hear her ask me questions that I forget as soon as they reach the beating drums of my ears, but I am guessing I answer them. She talked to 9-1-1 for days, months. I kept crying. I kept saying “I’m sorry.” When I closed my eyes everything happened backwards. Eve put the apple back on the branch. The tree shrank back into the ground. god said let there be light… and there was darkness. The pool of blood in my teacup hands grew more and more full when my door opened. I remember trying to get out on my own; I remember trying to run away. The officer told me to settle down and to not move and that everything would be just fine and that they were going to put me on a gurney and asked if my neck or back hurt or if I was seeing spots and what my address was and when my birthday was and other things and other things and other things. I dropped the blood and it flowed over my pants and my insides were on the outside and I couldn’t breathe. They placed my shaking skeleton into their ambulance. I had never felt so dead in my life. I went into shock. I only breathed when they reminded me to. I felt sick to my stomach; I felt drunk. The old man sitting in the back of the ambulance kept telling me to breathe. Kept telling me that everything would be fine. “I’m sorry.” “Sweetheart just try to steady your breathing. We’ll be at the hospital soon.” “I’m sorry.” “What’s your name sweetie?” “I’m sorry.” My head is feeling lighter and lighter and I can hear my heart slow in my ears. I see him writing on a clipboard and I hope he is writing Sorry, I’m. I want to be defined by my mistakes. Every speed bump we hit feels like Hurricane Katrina. He tells me to let him know if anything hurts. I want to tell him my heart hurts; that when we arrive at the hospital my mother will most likely be 10 minutes late, and my father will not be there at all. I want to tell him to not let them pray for me. I want to tell him that I’ve bled before, but not this much, and that the day before when I whispered to the heavens that I would give anything to take my last breath, that I didn’t mean it. That the intersection of Western Row and Kings Island Drive would become my gravestone.

The rest is blurred from 3 shots of morphine and the effects of shock. I still shake when my mom doesn’t stop far away enough from the cars in front of us. I still feel trapped when my car door won’t open. I am still sorry.