You are my sin

The reason I will never transcend

Never achieve my dreams

Stuck with my weakness and your schemes

Always was ***** whenever you were near

How could I be clean with you here?

Tainted me long ago

Your touch is all I know

Crave what you can give

It's as though your the reason I live

The man who is nice and wants me

I cannot tell him that your all I see

Always comes back to you once I fall

Im never able to have it all

Seep into my concious when I think everything is going fine

Reminding me bitterly that my heart isn't mine

You had a hold of me then, still won't let me be

My lost lover will always be my most fatal tragedy

It was loud
Thunder booming in the background
Lightning offering its shine to all those without light
The old man with no hope knew he was in for a long night
Numb from the normal aches that come with old age
The knife in his heart masking the pain
Ever since his love had been called away and he was left here to stay
Left in the old house wishing she was still there to fill the emptiness
Pain was difficult before she parted; Now pain was the Ultimate test
Dripping of the rain the splatter here and there
Filling the silence yet making the loneliness too much to bare
Thoughts of a crooked grin
Eyes forever young. Ones he'd never see again
Do you know what it is like to miss half of your heart?
Have the ultimate love then have death tear your world apart?
Reached in so suddenly and took her away
What was once meant to be now is gone and the man doesn't know if he should stay
It'd be so easy to join the girl
May she be how she was before?
Back when they first met
Back before all he did was mourn and wept
When her hair was long and flowing
Baby blue eyes full of the love she was always showing
Smile so quick to warm the heart
That girl was mine before the start
She was destined to me. And I was her one and only.
A woman so kind and caring for a man who had been so lonely
Now my wrinkle hands tremble as I stand in the heart of the storm
Looking upward for a sign of her as I mourn
Praying lightning would strike down and send me home
Back into her arms so that I'm no longer alone
Wanting to end it all right here and now Knowing that she would take my decision with a frown
She was never about taking the easy way out
Always knowing what was best without a doubt
So taking shelter away from the storm.. away from this pain
I will live until I am called home. Then with her I will remain

Missing you
someone I barely knew
Walking that dark path
You walked it too
I was forever sinking to a place where the sinners go
Trying to hold on and not fall between the cracks in that broken road
Hearing voices screaming at me to not stray from my path
Thought you were a lost soul like me till the moment we crashed
Came running at me so suddenly in full speed
Felsh and golden eyes
That was the first moment I noticed your wings
Shaking me urgently pointing upward
I tried to tell you to speak in words
Your lips moved to speak but I could barely hear
Your mouth would open and the voices would scream out in fear
You reached out and took my hand holding it up so that I could see
My flesh was rotting like my soul
I was slowly losing the real me
I looked up in fear to gaze into your eyes once again
This time I heard the words you said
Your voice was something unique
Reached into my dark soul and comforted me
Spoke of turning away from my path
I cried and said there was no going back
You said, "Take my hand and I'll teach you to soar."
"I can't stand to fly." I yelled and started to cry more
Dropping to the ground and screaming out in inner pain
I felt the broken earth quake
Looking up slightly I saw your golden eyes wet like rain from the sky
Tears of the angel cried for someone as weak as I
Kneeling beside where I had dropped to my knees
Reached out with a swoosh of your wings
Consumed in a feeling that I had never experienced
Watching glimpses of all my past sins
Tears still falling freely as I begged for amends
Gasping as a booming voice yelled, "Your Forgiven!"
Released me so suddenly from your hold
When I opened my eyes I didn't see the eyes that were so gold
No broken path before me
I was where I once was before I lost the ability to see clearly
Strayed so far from what was right
You saved me from an eternity of no sight
I miss you in my weakest moments when I have the urge to give in
Picturing your eyes helps me to resist to not give into my past sins

She was beautiful
Her blonde hair flowed past her waist
Very shy creature, always hiding her perfect face
Everything I had needed at the time
Love was something I'd never hoped to find
For a short while though
It had been mine
If I could stop this clock
Rewind back before the shock
I'd breathe her in and never release
Keep her tight. Hold her close to me
Missed opportunities don't compare to this
Being so close to eternal bliss
With one wrong move and one misguided doubt of the mind
Wrecked my chances with the girl I had searched so hard to find
My false happiness can only last so long
Sitting here while she is moving on, trying to be strong
Never knew it was possible to drown in memories
Knowing blue eyes that seem to haunt me, refusing to let me be
I need her next to me. This agony won't cease
I need my love. Only she can bring me peace

Take me
Take my body
Let me slip
Fall from his grasp
Hide me please
A place unknown
Don't let him near
All I want
Is for you to listen
Hear my silent pleas
Save me from the man
The man I loved
The man who shouldn't be
All I need is to be saved
So I can be free
So take me
Take my body

If I were to sit you down and admit to all the times I wished you were him

Would you admit to feeling the same?

Would you say that you wished that I was her?

If only this life had brought us together in a different way

Then maybe we'd be together

I'd save you from yourself

You'd save me from becoming somebody else

If I truly wanted you to rescue me from my mistakes

Could you?

Would you leave her to come help me?

The answer is one we already know

You would.

I know this with all that I am

Some hearts our drawn together

Even when they shouldn't be

Unable to resist the tug of the rope that holds their souls together

Combining them as one

Like a any tragedy where love is conquered by the reality of everyday life

We'll never be able to prove our love to each other

Too many road blocks stand in our way

Walls that we are incapable of tearing down

But if you could whisper the three words  before you disappear

At least I'd know

That if things were different our love would rise above

Ashes smolder quietly on the ground

Death often has no sound

Flames spread so very quick

No time to respond to the Devils trick

Angels cry at innocence loss

Into heaven victims cross

Blame is put on the survivor

Denial is claimed; the people call lier

Punishment for living so it seems

Shot rings out that follows screams

Once a survivor; survivor no more

Judge reads verdict like it's a chore

Not guilty they found

Innocence is nothing if their in the ground

Devil smiles in his lair

Flames still rise up through the air

Evil strikes upon this town

Don't rise up instead they bow down

Why give into the Devils game

Its us who feeds the flame

Uncertainty is running through me consuming my mind
Filling it with thoughts that make it impossible to unwind
How am I to break free if he refuses to let me be
Showing up day after day
His memory refusing to fade
These negative feelings continue to stay
His dark eyes haunting me with pain
Yet I know our love is something we will not regain
Time to shut the door on what was
Let the present lead me to true love

I found you that day
Or was it the other way
Around
Round, you spun me in circles
I'm still dizzy from the
Fall
Fell hard, the impact shattered me
Disrupted my firm
Belief
Believed my heart was his
But I didnt actually hear the
Beat
Beating out of my chest when I saw you
How can I love him but I want
You
You're so confusing to my binded heart
I need you and for some reason I can't bare  to
Part
Depart from the tangled mess my heart got itself into to
I keep asking myself how do I
Choose?
Choice isn't mine really
See its also up to you to decide what you
Want
Wanting and needing are two different things
I want to fix him, but I need to fix you, the one who left me
Wrecked
Wreck my senses, not sure what to do
Need a second opinion fore I fear of making a
Mistake
Mistaken and Ending up with no one
Not you or him, just me
Alone

Then it was you and me. Everyone else were nobodies. Not as free, just wanting to succeed.

Trying to please everybody wasn't for us. We had eachother in our lust. Nobody else did we trust.

How were we to know that this would all end? Always breaking but refusing to mend. Our Love never really did begin.

Just that ever taunting lust was always present. Tainting our senses, refusing to relent. Needing to go back to the beginning to find out what this all meant.

Could we have been more? Did we deny  a love that could've been the cure? Fixed the shattered mess that is our souls, diminish our wicked allure.

Now I'm sitting here with a heart in my trembling hands. Desperately wishing I could go back and fix the man. But at the time mending a broken soul was never part of the plan.

He was willing to try for me. Pick up the broken pieces of the dark memories. For some reason his compassion terrified me, I had the urge to flee.

All that it could be. All that it should be. All that it would be. My choices have a haunting ending. Sitting here figuring out what he was to me. I finally see.

That man was everything. Yet I just let him roam free. Leaving me here with my heart on my sleeve. My decision taunting me.

The night air had never made me feel so lonely

Walking this path without my one and only

Hand in hand we use to stroll so carefree

Now the quiet reminds the soul that it's only me

Cold wraps around me, seeping into my bones

Hope it would numb me so I wouldn't feel so alone

They say after your love passes you can feel them near

But I'd be warm and happy if you were here

Snow covers my loose hair, tickling my ears

The night is so quiet, awakening my fears

Giving me time to think of what use to be

Can't even take a walk to be free of your memory

Everywhere I turn something reminds me of the past

Your impacted my heart so much I'm afraid the pain will last

Snowflakes all around making the pathway to our spot a white dream

Remember how in the summer we'd run until we got to the stream

We'd strip bare and jump in

Not worrying about anything, not knowing this all would end

I lay down now letting cold surround me and closing my eyes

Spreading my arms, making a angel and pretending to fly

How I want to fly to you

I want all that we had wanted to come true

Go back in time and save you from yourself

So stubborn, you always refused help

One more weak swipe of the arms, I stop my wings

I try to listen closely to hear if the angels will sing

Sorrowful tune for the emptiness I feel inside

I need to start accepting, all I seem to do is hide

Shaky breath I stand up and tilt my head up toward the sky

With a quiet whisper I send you a goodbye

Girl so small why do you cower?
Hiding behind walls
Keeping yourself locked in that tower
Afraid of everything, afraid to live.
If you stay hidden when will this life ever begin
Past is something that left you broken
Weighed down with dark thoughts that remain unspoken
Sheltered within these stone walls
Hear the temptation but ignore the calls
Will you ever truly be if you don't take risks?
Think about all the opportunities you will miss
Yes the bottom is so far down
The climb will be worth it when your feet hit the ground
Negative souls will be against your escape
Others will be encouraged by one so brave
Stop feeling trapped when you have a way to be free
That window is small yet it still allows you to see
Climb down from your tower once in awhile and explore
Don't constantly stay hidden if you secretly yearn for more

Lure you in with a false promise

I swear to always be honest

Never leave you behind

Oh Darling, you'll learn im anything but kind

Say one thing, I'll do the other

If there was a next time you'd be careful when choosing a lover

I'm agony disguised as lust

Oh love, if only you'd been wise when deciding who to trust

Now come to me my one and only

A white lie won't hurt the lonely

By the time I finish my game

You will know nothing but pain

Manipulative is what they call me

They say that woman is just in it for money

It's not true my love. I'm in it for you

I bring companionship and a promise to stay true

Promise is for a short time

But still it brings you peace of mind

As I watch you smile at me and begin to tire

I smile back then light the match to my fire

As I watch smoke fill the air I feel no shame

Oh how I enjoy playing the husband game

Walking away with my winnings and a map

I send thanks to the devil for helping with my trap

You have been lurking in the shadows of sorrow

So full of pain

Shadows reached out fingers of death

Clawing at your despair

Dragging you down the path that is often taken

At the end burns an icy hell

Somehow you turned that darkness into light

You conquered so much, and you continue to move forward

Leaving the dark past behind

At times you hear your old sins calling your name

Ignore the temptation

What is the point of moving forward

If you only plan to give in

Everyday you will want to go back to the familiar

Remember that this path is for the better

Never turn back

When you do it will be worse than before

Will be harder to stay true

You will succeed if you focus on the now

Accomplish your goals

Don't ever turn back down the path of sin

Sorrow only wins when you give in

Don't you know her?
She is the one that makes you wait
Makes you contemplate
Everything you once believed
Even though you don't know her
She is all you will see
She'll reach in and grab your heart
Won't release it
Even when you need to part
Hold you tight within her grasp
Falling for her is something that happens fast
Never have spoken to her one word
Yet your love is what you need to be heard
She teases you with the possibility of forever
Makes you remember some ties can't be severed
The invisible rope she has around you
You won't ever be able to cut through
Forget your fear; Make her see what your love can mean
This one will haunt you whether you hide or choose to be seen

A vision stills my breath

My body aches

Everything dims out of focus

My only sight is of you

Feeling close to the edge

Take a leap of faith

Fall

You refuse to catch me

Smirking as I break

My weakness is him

He's the only one

Who can lend me strength

Stubborn becomes you love

Ignore your heart

I'll sit here broken

Watch as I fall apart

But when I gain the strength to stand on my feet

I'm heading your way

I will not bow down to you

If you don't return my love

I become your enemy

So take my heart

It's all yours

But I won't let you forget my Love

That's for **** sure

Tell me you want me behind Closed doors
To the world though I'm known as the town *****
Say you'd be crazy to claim me in front of the public eye
I say if you didn't want me then all you told me were lies
I'm not someone who is ashamed of my past
If you had a problem why did you play it like you wanted us to last
So I'm a little young, you knew that going in
Stop acting like I'm the only one who made all the sins
You didn't have to come to me at night
Whispering sweet nothings, crawling between my thighs
Take your lies before I rip out your heart
Skin you and stuff you, display you like art

Where did he go? Once was here and so close
Then all of a sudden he was called home
Rain splattered on the concrete that night
Masking my tears from sight
Sobs were lost in the howling wind
Storm of sorrow reminded that he wouldn't be back again
How does a bright day get consumed in darkness so quickly?
From happiness to sorrow, it surrounded me so swiftly
The Lord decided it was time for you to leave
Now im left here with a soul that is no longer complete
Sometimes when the storm fully surrounds me
I wish to just give in and end my misery
To be called home into your arms where it's warm
Saved from my sorrow so I'd no longer have to mourn
Memories of you haunt me everyday
I'm so tired of never seeing color, only a bitter grey
Before you helped me to look at the world vividly with open eyes
Now I try to look but what I see I can't help to despise
Everything you once showed me to love
Was taken from me when you were called above
Maybe one day I'll be able to look past this grief that leaves me broken and torn
I just wish I could stop time, rewind, and  go back to save you before the storm

I lay here silently
Feeling him
Breathe
Chest moving subtly
In and
Out
Letting me know
Alive and well
My
One is laying beside me
I feel complete in this
Love
Laying here with the man
The man I call
Home
Soft snores
Fill the Silence and this
Is
Another act that makes me smile
And wonder
How
Did I ever get this lucky
He makes someone as weak as
I
Strong and sure
That's how he makes me
Feel
Arms will pull me closer
My heart beat becomes unsteady
When
His hand does gently caress my left hip
And this leaves me aching and now
I'm
Feverish with need as my body yearns
To mold with yours whenever you're
Near
Safe and secure
Is my soul with
You
I love this man sleeping next to me
He is mine to love and
Hold
Refusing to let go
Of this man who holds
Me
Even in the dead of night
I feel safe with him
Close
With this man
My soul has found its place
*Forver

You have been lurking in the shadows of sorrow

So full of pain

Shadows reached out fingers of death

Clawing at your despair

Dragging you down the path that is often taken

At the end burns an icy hell

Somehow you turned that darkness into light

You conquered so much, and you continue to move forward

Leaving the dark past behind

At times you hear your old sins calling your name

Ignore the temptation

What is the point of moving forward

If you only plan to give in

Everyday you will want to go back to the familiar

Remember that this path is for the better

Never turn back

When you do it will be worse than before

Will be harder to stay true

You will succeed if you focus on the now

Accomplish your goals

Don't ever turn back down the path of sin

Sorrow only wins when you give in

I am nothing

As you look at me now

I breathe; I scream; I cry; I feel

But all this is an illusion for what I truly am

What I'll never overcome

I am nothing

I'll never truly be seen

You say you care? Maybe you do

Even so I'm not worth the thought

I know what I am

What I'm worth

This life has left my conscious in the dirt

Soon I'll be in the ground

I'll be forgotten

Sure you might miss me for a while

But soon I'll fade away from your mind

Once again I'll be what I once was

What I'll always be

Nothing special for all to see

For all to forget

His recklessness was something that drew me in
Wrecked my senses, falling deeper once again
He was everything that was bad for my sanity
He very quickly became a everyday fix in my reality
Arrogance had never suited one so handsomely
The dark creature carried himself with more than just authority
Respect was something he always received
Never had to cower or bow to anybody
Not like me having to bleed and claw my way through life
He had already earned his right
Already had bled to get that he had received
Worked hard everyday to succeed
When we first me he would smile at me, a cheshire cat grin
Telling me how to never look back on your past sins
Fearless was what this man was
Afraid of nothing but to Love
Which I found out eventually on a late spring day
When I woke up to a empty room with nothing left but a cigarette bud in the ash tray
I couldn't seem to regret loving the man
For somewhere deep in my mind I had always knew his plan
He grew up in a place that would make even the devil shudder
It only made sense that he wouldn't know how to deal with a true lover
Only knowing sin and people who had betrayed his trust
My lover only really knew of lust
He was born in a world well the good leave
Where you tell white lies with the intention to deceive
Angry I am cause I know that his memory won't fade
As I gather up what is left and exit the place where our love was made
Deceive me he did in more ways than one
So goodbye my Lover I guess our time is done

Her innocence caught a wild heart off guard
Stealing my breath as I tried to resist not to fall too hard
Her optimistic view of the world was everything unknown
The darkness in me needed her to take a glimpse of the world I had been shown
The untainted part of my mind screamed for me to stay away
Steady beat of my once quiet heart wouldn't let reason have the final say
She was everything I'd never been
I was her passage way into the world of sin
Untouched so far but a few scratches here and there from trying to fit into today's society
I had already clawed and fought my way to where I wanted to be
Beauty is something I would've called her then
Now I value her more than I ever did
She was everything I didn't know I needed at the time
The faint beat grew more steady with each day I continued to call her mine
There came a night when cold and smoke surrounded me
Looking into my window I saw my angel asleep
I felt my heart swell with an emotion that seemed to be more than I could take
Frightened the side of me that was still consumed in past mistakes
She slept so soundly as I crept back in quietly with the plan to get away
Gathered up my stuff and ignored the sound of something in me shattering as I left her there to lay
Cold was all I felt walking away from her
Time is something I now wish I could reverse
I would go back in and stay inside
Wrap my arms around her and vow to never leave her behind
In the past I had carried myself proudly and seemed so sure
Who knew i'd be brought to my knees by someone so innocent and pure
Only my stubbornness kept me from returning that night
By the time I had realized my mistake she had dissapeared from my sight
I search for her even now
The girl who made my heart beat loud
It's a unsteady sound without her near
She needs to be found so that she could hear
Love that radiates within my soul for only her
Need to find her and make things right with my world
Now that she's gone my arrogance faded and allowed me to admit that I had been blind
My fear ruined me for the girl that was suppose to be mine

Raise the weapons high

Smoke fill the sky

Prepare to be consumed by my wrath

Welcome to my bloodbath

Men resume your battle stance

Tonight many will fall in this bitter dance

Peace doesn't exist as I fire the first shot

Fighting for a cause that many forgot

I feed off their greed

It is a substance that I need

Rage makes me stronger

I have lived for many years, now I live longer

Humans are weak, easy to manipulate

They stand no chance against Fate

I had a dream where you didn't leave

Held you close, tight, right next to me

Your eyes did shine and my heart wasn't sore

Looking at me with love like you did before

Told me you'd be here till the end of time

Kissing you close not recognizing a lie

Go
Just go
Fade away like this dream
Nothing is ever what it seems
We will never be

When I wake reality is harsh to a dreamer

Dose of cold air delivered by a schemer

Showed me the side of him that made me fall

Left me with the side of him he never showed at all

Though he's gone, he stays

Showing up in my dreams day after day

Go
Just go
Fade away from my mind
If only I could turn back time
Then you'd be mine

I need you gone, need you to leave

For once I just beg for peace

Stop smiling at me at night

Just stop making my heart want something that isn't right

It's unhealthy to ache for something that can't be fixed

Tired of missing someone that shouldn't be missed

So go
Please go
Fade away from my heart
I can't take this constant reminder that we are apart
I need a new start

I'm ******* and my stomach is weighted down
A dark force is trying to make us disappear into the ground
He followed me with a noose that hung around a slender neck
A vulture who haunts my flesh just waiting for a peck

Hitting my chest to get the negativity out
envisioning light entering and the darkness dispersing about
Yet I still hear the hangman's words
I blocked them, yet they are still heard

"Little skinny girl,
just used for a cinnamon swirl
She will stutter just a little more
I can't seem to find her allure."

He has a hold on me whispering line after line
I honestly don't think I will make it in time
I found a place of redemption and a glimmer of hope
Yet I fall every time my foot moves to leave this slippery *****

Loosen the knot and slide your rope around me
Make sure there is a snap when I start to swing

It's not sleeping like a dead man that terrifies me
Its waking up to remember that I am one

Dangerously Toxic
Yet immune to this
Addictive drug I can't shake
Inhale in all I can take
Breathe in this obsession
I am okay with being your possession
Intoxicating lies
Drunk on this high
Spiraling out of control
I can’t resist the pull
Ignorance is bliss
Yet freedom is what I miss
Freedom I do not seek for
The ropes will tighten even more

Today I gazed upon nature with closed eyes
I discovered where true happiness lies
The gentle rustle of a soft breeze
How the critters taunt and tease
My tense body wanted to realx and be brave
To become as at peace and as still as the trees is something I crave

Feet so heavy, let's stay grounded today
Sheets so white and crisp where they lay

These hands are so twisted as they move to fold
Cracked and dry making the linen go crimson in their hold

We messed up the work with our blood
Go to reload the machine but alas, a flood!

Open up the exit, pushing the filthy water out with a broom
Sweat, blood, and bile pile up in the concrete room

Goodness! Our feet are no longer grounded
They are embedded into the floor as if they had been pounded

I thought to leave soon before my life fades away
The corporate world is hard to exit, and offers little pay

Cease, oh, cease thou foul play
that words sickly and sweet fell
And his hazel eyes, loving like sunrise on a cold day,
Colors that will mislead and mix into gray;
But our lips come together to keep us sane,
Sealing an unknown, maybe in vain

Moan, oh, moan in sorrow
Which thy stone heart cracks a slight,
On to the next stone for hope of tomorrow
It is her duty to mend not borrow;
But first think of him in kind
Lust will one day leave us blind

Oh, Sunrise and Sunset!
He is very close
In such a way that is far
Made of the same substance
Will time matter so much?
For like the nun’s and their piety
I have devotion, do you?

He could paint my lips red –
Color that the sunrise bled
And an orange fog
Thus, I’ll be not as dark
Tonight, we will not meet!

Alas, the sunrise is haunted
He is surrounded by eyes –
Once closed after sunset
Like a sprite hiding in a Lilly
I hide for the sunrise
An inevitable loss

I had a dream where you didn't leave

Held you close, tight, right next to me

Your eyes did shine and my heart wasn't sore

Looking at me with love like you did before

Told me you'd be here till the end of time

Kissing you close not recognizing a lie

Go
Just go
Fade away like this dream
Nothing is ever what it seems
We will never be

When I wake reality is harsh to a dreamer

Dose of cold air delivered by a schemer

Showed me the side of him that made me fall

Left me with the side of him he never showed at all

Though he's gone, he stays

Showing up in my dreams day after day

Go
Just go
Fade away from my mind
If only I could turn back time
Then you'd be mine

I need you gone, need you to leave

For once I just beg for peace

Stop smiling at me at night

Just stop making my heart want something that isn't right

It's unhealthy to ache for something that can't be fixed

Tired of missing someone that shouldn't be missed

So go
Please go
Fade away from my heart
I can't take this constant reminder that we are apart
I need a new start

The moth headed toward the sun
I watched him silently for a little fun
I had thought maybe if I muted the light
Then his death wouldn't be in my line of sight
I thought that maybe I could capture him then
he wouldn't burn in this world so full of sun and sin
I continued to dream and watch the creature fly in a haste
He bled out luck and gave it away, I was tempted for a taste
I was so tempted to form a prison for him in my hands, hoping
to live a life with one so lucky for others but so unlucky with no way of coping
I reached out to to touch the white wing, only for it to turn to dust upon my caress
were we not meant to be, or was the sun in my heart too much or too less?
So addicted we were, light and a plain moth that couldn't resist the flame
I wonder if I was too hot for the man, or maybe the all pain inside of me was too much of a shame
The moth was headed toward the sun but dispersed before he could truly appreciate its love
I was fire and tried to capture him, but I have always burned when push comes to shove.

Tears choked back, held in, and were locked deep inside
Chest cavity opened to an emptiness that couldn't subside
Slippery oil dark and thick took its root in my core
A sickness of the pain that I couldn't hold in anymore
It leaked out like dark thoughts into my gut and made me nauseous
If I had know the results of my control I would have been more cautious
Cautious in the way of never letting go and hiding behind the lie
I would have lived more in a way of freedom and flying high
Instead of quick sand always making me sink and crawl
I would have picked a cliff with a beautiful waterfall
When my body would fall forward my soul would be wiped clean
At least I know I would've died to a wonderful scene

If I hold this head in shaking arms
will you run away in fright?
If my eye sockets are bare and my scalp without hair
Would you scream before witnessing my sorrow
Curiously, I would run before you
Cradling my skull like a newborn babe
I would run away from the possibility of redemption
The eternal rest is a frightening notion
Decomposing girl is forever running
I lack comprehension
I breathe in fear
I am nothing but bones

Crafty and cunning,
prepare me for my public shunning.
Withhold my truth again.
How am I to defend?

Words screamed into my bleeding ears.
Am I consumed by your fears?
Shadow hands, they pressed so ******* my chest.
Maybe I will faint and get some rest.

Harsh words slice through me.
The violence caused by him is all I see.
One would think that the plate that shattered,
wouldn't look so appealing with its pieces all scattered.

If I bleed on my terms would I feel fine?
Would his and my sins then intertwine?
Would we be able to finally stand on common ground?
Maybe I will faint; I will fade away without being found.

Her fingers are long and thin
Hips jut out, skin stretched around the bone
Cheeks are sunken
Eyes are glazed
Hair has lost its sheen
You would think she was a ghost
Faded away into a pile of bones
Her smile, though, is so wide
She is hope
She is more than her body
Her mind is most certainly lost
Her spirit is glowing
Body is fading
She might disappear
When she goes she is going all the way
She refuses to return
Reincarnation is overrated
This soul needs rest

Come lay me down
I was just thinking
About you
Come hold me
I am so lonely
without you
Take this tongue
I was just wanting a taste
of you
Take a picture and put it in my brain
I am lacking vision I
need to see you
Saw off my hand to hold
I would like to
feel you
Drink my blood
I need me
in you
Stay in this cage
I know you wouldn't leave
I will keep
You

It is wonderful how you sway
Back and fourth, you're coming my way
Come to me my sweet
Let the music move my feet
Closer to you because I love it slow
I will follow wherever you go
Shadow, I am. Shadow I will stay
Mimicking you all the way
Never seen a soul so fine
It is beautiful how we intertwine

It all started when I was seven after making a decision to eat eight apples with the core

It made me weak and my stomach lurch, leading ultimately to ***** all over the floor

That urge showed up again not long after when I decided to runaway alone

I got picked up and brought to a place that one could call a dead zone

If I had any sense it was lost tens years past

My life is simple, until it’s not and then it’s a nice contrast

If I spill beet juice on the sheets it turns into mess that wounds his heart

When he bleeds on the sheets it doesn't resemble the juice, and a mess is now art

It all started with a knife and an apple to slice, a waiting voice to persuade

My stomach churned while the hand twitched causing me to miss, but he met my blade

Such a sweet fruit
Such a sweet life
Will it stain my knife?

Shhh... let's be quiet baby
The night is so loud, it got me thinking that maybe...
You and I could fade away
Disappear down to the Long Creek grave
I heard a tale that the ghosts will dance
You need to knock on Sarah's stone for the chance
Lift your hand baby, and knock three times
One, Two, Three. Do you hear the chimes?
Gentle tings in the distance. Oh, what could it be?
I feel a wiggle and you suddenly push away from me
Hey now honey... it is only my the worm that hides in my cheek
It likes to come through my rotting flesh for a peek
Nevermind the interruption of our fun
You and I are nowhere near done
You knocked precisely right
For that, I shall dance all night

Limbs stretch out and droop downwards in warning
The wind whistles and shrieks in a desperate yearning
Leaves are hiding in the dirt
The earth seems to always fall short

Humanity is taking without a sound
Knees are padded by the wet ground
The dirt under bare feet is a red sand
It burns in my cracked hands

Seeping through my hold like a useless thought
I was thankful for the chaos the rain brought
Droplets hits the impenetrable dirt and still remain on the surface
I am nothing but stillness on my knees waiting to drown, accepting my life purpose

I once loved a willow tree so full life
She died waiting for me, and my love was a knife
I took all that was offered; I stripped her of her clothing
I thought for sure my love would fill her with loathing

Her limbs lost it's skin and twisted in sadness
But my willow did not leave me alone in my madness
So selfless my dead willow is on this dying land
She gives and gives to this broken man

Giving it all to my begging body and empty word
Save me when the water gets to high and my begs are no longer heard

Limbs stretch out and droop downwards in warning
The wind whistles and shrieks in a desperate yearning
Leaves are hiding in the dirt
The earth seems to always fall short

Humanity is taking without a sound
Knees are padded by the wet ground
The dirt under bare feet is a red sand
It burns in my cracked hands

Seeping through my hold like a useless thought
I was thankful for the chaos the rain brought
Droplets hits the impenetrable dirt and still remain on the surface
I am nothing but stillness on my knees waiting to drown, accepting my life purpose

I once loved a willow tree so full life
She died waiting for me, and my love was a knife
I took all that was offered; I stripped her of her clothing
I thought for sure my love would fill her with loathing

Her limbs lost it's skin and twisted in sadness
But my willow did not leave me alone in my madness
So selfless my dead willow is on this dying land
She gives and gives to this broken man

Giving it all to my begging body and empty word
Save me when the water gets to high and my begs are no longer heard

Squeezing and contracting
Breathing and relaxing
Slap me hard so my eyes open wide
If your mouth is so big, in who do I confide?
Something about our encounter is disturbing

Ripping and tearing
Eating and sharing
My heart is fatty, so don't enjoy it too much
If your incisors are pointy, how do I touch?
My disappearance will surely be preturbing

Screaming and moaning
Digging and burning
The match is wet, find a new way to light me
This grave is too shallow, won't they see?
Will I be indebted to you in death?

Stuttering and silence
Running and violence
Burning body is thin and kneeling before him
On my knees like a good girl, is this a sin?
Hangman loves to steal my breath

Closed eyes and deep breathing
I sat comfortably
I was looking for something
I had opened the door, revealing a staircase
Stepping and breathing as I descended downward
I was so close to the bottom
I almost could see
Five, four, and just three more
My body froze
It's a certain kind of sickness, my fear.
A part of me wanted to complete my journey
I wanted to scream while jumping the rest of the way
But my feet continued to stay glued to the third step
I felt it gather around me, seeping into my bones
Its cold limbs squeezing me
I was held into place
Relaxing into my darkness helped me regain control
I thought surely I could move forward now
How silly of me and my stinging eyes
The dam broke
The body shook
Yet still, I could not move ahead
I had a glimpse
I had a dream
I was a step that would not be taken