Closed eyes and deep breathing
I sat comfortably
I was looking for something
I had opened the door, revealing a staircase
Stepping and breathing as I descended downward
I was so close to the bottom
I almost could see
Five, four, and just three more
My body froze
It's a certain kind of sickness, my fear.
A part of me wanted to complete my journey
I wanted to scream while jumping the rest of the way
But my feet continued to stay glued to the third step
I felt it gather around me, seeping into my bones
Its cold limbs squeezing me
I was held into place
Relaxing into my darkness helped me regain control
I thought surely I could move forward now
How silly of me and my stinging eyes
The dam broke
The body shook
Yet still, I could not move ahead
I had a glimpse
I had a dream
I was a step that would not be taken