My best kept secret
Is that I love you
So much that sometimes it frightens me
And I enjoy my time
Spent wasting nights in your bed
Just please remember darling
I like bruises on my thighs
Not my arms
And there are boundaries
You just shouldn't push

I have never
Been considered
"Good enough".

A thing I have struggled with
My entire life.

I have never
Been considered
"Good."

By the people
Who supposedly make those judgments.

But who am I?
To live my life by judgments
Of others
Who are not in my head,
And who were not there for the events
That have made me who I am.

Because those that matter
Will stay,
Will listen,
Will hear me out
In the darkest depths
Of my darkest moments.

They will understand
My defense mechanisms
Of hostile sarcasm
And quiet tears that come too often.

I close my eyes,
And remember a voice,
Remember a smile,
A laugh,
And everything slows and calms
Rather rapidly.

And I am in love
And I am happy,
And I am okay.

My Bluebird
Loves me,
And I am not alone,
Despite the feelings the nightmares haunt me with.

And darkness,
Sick and strange,
Tries to creep inside my mind,
And I will fight it off.
As I am good,
And that in itself is good enough.