So here I am drunk again

Drinking my sorrow's away

When will anyone understand

Understand the pain....

The life of a gun for hire a killer of war

The dreams that haunt.....that only come out when  full of spirits

From gloomy drunk too  furious killer

Who will understand my pain....

Who will understand my nightmares....

I'm alone lost in the pain....

For the very first time.....I'm lost......
In every sense of the word....I thought I had everything

Then That all changed when I met you......you took my sanity....my mind pleads me to move  on but my heart keeps falling for you every time I gaze into your eyes

How do you cope with life,
When the pain is to much?

When that hole in your heart is blacker than an abyss.

When all the drugs in the world no longer lead to comatose.
......SOULESSS.........

EMPTY...........


.................LOS­T

You were once my shelter my, addiction....

I'm lost in your walls gasping for air,.... breathing in cyanide....... I need you now more than ever......or do I even need you?

Crimson skies dwell above
A caliginous passanger to her allurment,
Her coarse body intertwined with the jagged thorns of a rose, reaching toward every vulnerable crevice.

Yet she stands ***** in her solitude,
Her beauty only amplified by the scars left from years of desolation.

She hides behind her labyrinth
A deceitful shelter from the elements

I journey through her path stumbling through the endless dark

occasionally I find myself aching from the pain as though I can no longer Travel through her unblazed path.

I only pray that one day I can Set my eyes upon her magnificient figure.

To see past her concrete walls and hold my Venus torment in all her pain and suffering.

I can see through your lies

Yet i sit here in silence
I am scared to love you like i loved her

So i let you walk away

I convince myself that i tried, that im too tired

I convince myself that hanging on to you, is like hanging on to barbed wire


I can see through your deception

Yet i stand idol
I am too scared to be left vulnerable and shattered

So i let you walk away

I dilute my pure thoughts perceiving them as reality

I dream of you yet i only perceive a nightmare

I can see past your eyes

I can see the warmth in your heart

I can see past your facades

I can see the true you

Only im scared to tell you "i love you" everyday
So i let myself **** up and

so i let you walk away.

I knew i would loose myself in the cold.

Ive been climbing this glacier for too long,

enduring the fridged winds and deadly slopes of the hillsides.

This is my nature a frozen iceland i was so use to the cold.

The company of frostbiten limbs reminding me i still have

some warmth to my body. My heart pumping the last of

the inevitabally dying warmth for so long i tryed to fight the cold,

to make belive i can make it out of this blizzard to find that warmth.

Every fire i ignited died out taking with it a little more energy.

Now i lay here facing the lone night sky embrassing the siberian cold

letting the cancerous frostbite chill my core and crystilze my blood.

each breath a kiss of death,

as i close my eyes my breath slows and i feel your warmth
one last time the heat of your heart and image of your smile draw out one last tear.

It corases my cheeck as it rolls towards the ground....then it lays solitary, frozen in time
and i let deaths cold hands **** the last flame i kept burning in my heart for you.