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358 · Jun 2012
Help
Robyn Jun 2012
He is crumbling
All I can do is watch as he is crumbling
First from my lips
Then through my fingers
He breaks
And falls in a heap on the ground
And I am frozen
As I watch
He crumbles in front of my eyes
And all I can do is watch
But he starts smiling
He smiles as he crumbles
I scream
LOOK AT YOURSELF
But he smiles
And smiles
When I finally move
I fall next to him
Trying to put him back together
But it won't work
And I cry
358 · Jan 2013
Funny
Robyn Jan 2013
"It's late" he whispered.
"I know, I know."
"I'm tired" he murmered.
"Then go, then go."
"I can't" he chuckled.
"Why not, why not?"
He was silent.
"Because you're hot."
357 · Nov 2012
Late
Robyn Nov 2012
It's getting late
And I'm pining for my home
It's far too late
And I'm all alone

A door has opened
To let me through
But how can I
Can I get to you?
357 · Jan 2015
go fight win
Robyn Jan 2015
In every breath
In every sigh
Days are pushing
Ever by
Slow and steady
Wins the race
Can't bear to travel
Such a pace
Temptations come
Temptations go
I love it when
You love me so
We grow stronger
As we pray
We love our Father
More every day
In His name may
We never fail
May our love
Never set sail
So proud to love you
So proud to be
The one you love
For you love me
355 · Nov 2014
Frost
Robyn Nov 2014
Silver veins in the silver city
Running like blood through the fainting grass
The cold pierces the flesh into the bone like a needle -
Delivering medicine promised to save but more likely to sicken
Robyn Feb 2013
Fearing God will leave her again
She wakes to an empty house
And screams in the living room
Because you are so, so beautiful
And she was so, so alone
353 · Aug 2014
alone
Robyn Aug 2014
The shoulders of your shirt are stained with my tears
Because you're not here wearing it
353 · Dec 2012
Place Your Bets
Robyn Dec 2012
With the blow to the cheek
With a scream at the meek
With a bruise that I seek
I will stand
With a cut on my face
With (out) a place
With a Judge to my case
I will stand
With a gun to the head
With a prayer for the dead
With everything I've said
I will stand
With a knife twixt my ribs
With my friends and their kids
Gentleman, you may now make your bids
I will stand

With a ***** of your finger
You fall
353 · Mar 2017
Laundry
Robyn Mar 2017
Depression is - emptying me.

Anxiety is - drying me out.
352 · Jul 2013
Courage 10w
Robyn Jul 2013
Even the heart of a lion can break in two.
Courage counts for nothing if I can't have you
352 · Oct 2012
Fire
Robyn Oct 2012
There's a fire in my heart
And my fingers are shaking
And the ground is quaking
And I can't hold on
There's a fire in my heart
And my face has turned red
And I wish I were dead
And I just can't hold on

I'm on fire
I'm on fire
Darling, put down the matches
Please God, put down the matches
Because I cannot survive
350 · Jul 2013
What They've Said To Me
Robyn Jul 2013
How aware are you that [he's] totally scoping you out?

You do realize that he's totally gunning for you, right?

You guys would make a really cute couple. I think he likes you.

He DOES stare at you, oh my gosh, I saw it. He stares at you all the time.

Thomas thinks [he] likes you, too.

Yeah, it's really obvious.
Why can't I believe it, still?
350 · Sep 2014
Susie q
Robyn Sep 2014
You're cutting me a piece of Susie Q.
You're sitting by me now, with a fork in your mouth.
I am in love with you.
And your elbow, resting on my knee.
347 · Sep 2014
closer
Robyn Sep 2014
I've never felt more alone
Than when you are

Two








Feet


















Away
347 · Dec 2012
late at night
Robyn Dec 2012
I find the best place to write
Is under the covers at night
When your Mother pounds her feet past your door
And you're fearful, waiting for more
You hear your Sister come home and strum her guitar
And you try to write late at night
But you cannot write far
Your Father asleep on the couch downstairs
And you write and you write
Though they are not aware
And you must beware
A knock at your door
For when you finally get caught
You cannot write anymore
345 · Dec 2016
Best Friends
Robyn Dec 2016
Skeletal cinnamon trees
Frosted with the breaking, grey sky
Know more love than you
And they know more life than I

Flowing as white as the snow
With the one that she loves by her side
She'll regret this day again
When she has nowhere to hide

And I'll sit and watch them freeze
And my fingers will go numb
In the coldness of their timing
Knowing I should be the one
344 · Jun 2014
More Reasons Why I Love You
Robyn Jun 2014
The way you smile when you look at me
- How you can fall in love with me all over again while I'm walking down the stairs
- How you honestly care about making me happy
- The way your blue eyes light up in the sun
- The long, gentle kisses you give my hands
- The sweatpants that you let me borrow
- How often you tell me you miss me
344 · Jan 2015
broken bleeding lips
Robyn Jan 2015
Imagine little kisses
Increasing in size
Imagine trees with Christmas lights
Swimming through blue eyes
Imagine happy smiles
Heavy breathing
New Year's Eve
Imagine everything you know you'll
Never have to leave
Imagine all your loved ones
Laughing with you on the couch
Imagine kissing til your lips are stung
A happy kind of ouch
Imagine love that never fades
Imagine winter shivering
Imagine me before you sleep
With my broken bleeding smiling lips
Quivering
343 · Sep 2014
in one of those
Robyn Sep 2014
In that huge block of cheap housing
Behind Target
In one of those buildings
In one of those apartments
In one of those rooms
On one of those walls will be a picture
Of us
Rings exchanged, kissing, pinky promised
And in another one of those rooms
In one of those apartments
In one of those buildings
In the huge block of cheap housing
Behind Target
You will be lying in bed next to Mrs. You
Miss Me?
341 · Apr 2016
Little Feet
Robyn Apr 2016
Warm days
Make me think of your little feet, little one
Your little toes
Wiggle, giggle
Warm days
Make me think of your laugh, little one
The little bubbles in your throat
funny, tummy
Warm days
Make me think of your name little one
Your little love letter
*Keasbey, Keasbey
One day she'll be ours
338 · May 2015
awake
Robyn May 2015
I just woke up
Curled in the smallest ball
Shivering underneath all my blankets
Tears still wet on my face
But you're still asleep
While I am awake

I just woke up
Looked at my phone and saw
That you hadn't called
I want to get out of this place
But you're still asleep
While I am awake

I just woke up
And everything crumbled around me
I feel sick and miserable
What kind of mess did I make
That you're still asleep
But I am awake
337 · Feb 2013
Day 1
Robyn Feb 2013
The package dropped
The message sent
3 2 1
Beginning our descent
He spoke
He spoke
I wrote
I smoke
This is the fear that blacks out my eyes
There's fear in my heart
There's no use for disguise
I'm tumbling
Fumbling
Stum
            b
                   l
                 i
                           n
                   g


Now that he knows
**He knows
337 · Mar 2013
I Asked For This
Robyn Mar 2013
I do not love you
I did not know
I thought I could have
I thought
I'd try
And with morning was goodbye
Were you my escape
Or another place to hide?
And what of promises?
I told myself I'd die
If I ever said goodbye
I want to love you
To love you all
But you're adding more weight
I'm beginning to fall
And this
Is what I asked for, this
Is my idea of bliss
Until I tear at my face
And I growl and I hiss
Because God gave me what I asked for
What I asked for
Is this
337 · Dec 2013
Diagnosed
Robyn Dec 2013
Poetry is parking spaces
Everything is taken
Poetry is winter
My lips in hiberation
Poetry is empty
There's no tricks left to pull
Poetry is empty
But my mouth is full
336 · Apr 2015
Untitled
Robyn Apr 2015
Mnyamata
I miss you so much.
3 more sleeps and I'll be home.

You know I'm so afraid of sleeping in this room - I've built a nest of blankets around me. I've locked the windows and closed the  door, I've moved things to block the closet doors, I have music and a fan for white noise and I'm still sleeping with a lamp on.
I don't know what's wrong with me.
How am I supposed to be an adult when can barely sleep with the lights off in my OWN room?

If you were here, I could sleep.
Every door and window open, no blankets or pillows and I'd sleep better than I ever have. I'd just hold on to you and dream. I don't why I'm so terrified to sleep alone.

I need you too, you know. I don't say that enough. You say beautiful things like that all the time, and I don't. I want to, I feel the same way, I just don't say then as often as I feel them.
I'm feeling it now.
I need you.
Pray for me.

Ndimakukonda
334 · Jul 2014
Sick and Sad
Robyn Jul 2014
You're sick
And I'm sad

Sometimes I'd like the rain to end
I wish I wasn't depressed
I wish I wasn't so broken
Sometimes you'd like to stand
On you're own two feet
Sickness lingers, grasping fingers
Failing bones, painful moans

I was never one to play by the rules of the game
A cheater, a liar
But you don't care
You'd follow me to anywhere
Though I'm insane
We're so the same
Inspired by Sick and Sad by Streetlight Manifesto
334 · May 2013
I'M RIGHT HERE
Robyn May 2013
I'm right here
Ready to forget
Ready to concede
Ready to believe
That all you say is true
And yet
I mean nothing to you
I'm right here
But all you see is dust
As if I've given up on trust
And run away without a word
If only you heard
What God told me
So very different from what you speak
And strong resolve
I can no longer fake it
My hand is right here
**All you have to do is take it
Robyn Dec 2012
The door is open
The cold will creep in
Food on the table
Eat, no one's able
The sun is shining
Behind this dying
And people crying
But no one's dead
I watch the cold come
It warms me up some
And I am crying
But no one's dead
I've pulled my hair out
I've scratched the walls up
I've bit my lips and
They are red
Around me wood rots
Around me cars stop
Around me wolve's jaws
But I'm not dead
I heard you speak this
I felt you feel this
I saw you see this
I felt you die

I'm crying like you're dead, though you're not, you're just indifferent
332 · May 2013
It's A Shame
Robyn May 2013
How I am so ashamed
Of everything I do
And everything I say
The way I feel is not "okay"
So when you ask me
"How are you?"
A hug, a kiss, a smile or two
You should be worried when I say
"I'm fine, no really, I'm okay"
329 · Apr 2014
Dying
Robyn Apr 2014
I'm losing my voice
But I'm never losing you
Even though I've finally realized
Dying's all we'll ever do
If it's 40 years from now
And God sends you off to sleep
I'll wait patiently until then
To lay down next to you and weep
Robyn Jul 2014
The statue was dark and broad
The sparse beginnings of a beard etched onto his strong face
He was in a sitting position, face turned away from me
The sun was beginning to set and met his eyes like the artist had planned it
His eyes were blue and lit up like forest fires so bright I lost my breath
His lips were still but looked like they might just twitch from their small half smile/ half grimace at any second
He had dark, gentle curls that twisted every which way like hallways on his head
And crowned the top of his ears, which the summer had made pink
His strong arms were bare and a little paler, I traced their shape over and over with my fingers
His hands and long thick fingers were wrapped around his left knee, as if in pain
He was, but he would never tell me so
The statue was perfect, still and full of life
Silent, making my heart pound so vulnerably loud I was afraid he would hear it
He must have, because he turned his face towards me and I could see my warped reflection in his eyes that shone like fire, and I could feel my stomach tighten and my breathing quicken and my hands make fists
And he looked at me for a moment before chuckling and asking "What are you looking at?"
I laughed, the irony lost on him and I never told him
He just took his hand from his knee, and slowly stroked my face from temple to jaw, smile widening and eyes brightening and he kissed me, lips warm
My statue, my little masterpiece
327 · Sep 2014
it's alright though
Robyn Sep 2014
Sometimes I just want to stop.
Stop breathing
Stop eating
Just stop
being.
I love my life I'm
happy. I
am
But sometimes I don't want to be anything anymore
It's like I can feel everything ripping
Apart my chest but
I also feel nothing.
Anxiety flooding every
Fiber
And yet nothings wrong
I miss my dad
I miss my Father
I want to go Home.
Sometimes
I want to stop being
R, don't worry too much. I'm okay, just a little anxious, a little down. Sleep well for me. I'll pretend you're here and maybe I'll sleep well too. I love you.
326 · Feb 2017
It's hiding in my head
Robyn Feb 2017
Anxiety is -
Telling yourself that you don't deserve to take medication, because you're just being dramatic.

Telling yourself that you're faking it, and you're wasting everyone's time.

Telling yourself that you'll never get better because there's nothing wrong with you anyway.

Anxiety is a liar.
The biggest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn't exist.
325 · Jan 2013
Jagged
Robyn Jan 2013
Cant we be broken together?
Our jagged parts could make a picture
Our rough edges could make a life
That we would both be better off living
324 · Jan 2013
Sister, I Love You So
Robyn Jan 2013
This is a woman I do not know
If she hurts, it does not show
If she cries, she does not seem to know
That the pain will go, the pain will go
Her heart has many secrets now
The kind that she may never allow
Me to know, or me to see
But I cheated
I took a peek
I know that it was wrong to do
But sometimes sister
I want to know you
But know that no matter what I know
I love you darling
I love you so
320 · Jun 2013
Thank God
Robyn Jun 2013
Finally
I can be free of this guilt and shame
That had my shoulders quaking
Finally
I can forget that night when your hand
Was on my face, shaking
Finally
I know that you can be free of me
Finally
I'm free to be free
319 · Apr 2014
Saved
Robyn Apr 2014
The curls behind your ears
The silver in your eyes
A thousand missing tears
A thousand missing lies
The way you say my name
I'll never be the same
Robyn Jul 2014
Even though your body is breaking
Even though my heart won't stop aching
Even though my fingers are shaking
I love you
Even though it's really unfair
Even though it's hard not to care
Even though everything I can't share
I love you
Even though you're in so much pain
Always sick, again and again
Even though my tears fall like rain
I love you
And be warned you might see cry
Even though you're not going to die
And I won't be able to lie
I love you
And when you're hooked up to all those IVs
And when those lips can't kiss these
Even when you cannot see me
I love you
Even though your body is breaking
Even though my heart won't stop aching
Even though my fingers are shaking
I love you
You're really sick and it really hurts. If I could promise you the things only wives can I would. If I could drop my whole life for you I would. I will do anything I can, even the smallest things, I just want you to feel better and live long. I need you. I need you as long as possible.
317 · Mar 2014
MissMe
Robyn Mar 2014
"Believe in yourself!"
"Be who you want to be!"
"Be weird!"
"Embrace your differences!"
"You're unique!"
"No labels!"
"Don't care what other people think!"
Cheered the girl with MissMe jeans
Three hundred MissMe wearing girls cheered back
316 · Oct 2016
Untitled
Robyn Oct 2016
This is how you're used
When I'm self afflicted
Self degrading
Self abused
He speaks through you
So I can breathe
This is what you mean to me
When I'm sick
And beat
And bruised
This is how God uses you
When you could choose
When you could lose
You love me and that's how He uses
YOU
316 · Feb 2013
Now Look What You've Done
Robyn Feb 2013
You've torn is apart
We used to be one
But it's done
And you'd much rather ****** our ears
With your playing of ivory
And your cackling leer
You're hurting us
Hurting us
And though we're not better
There's one thing to fix you
One day you'll understand
So come on World
**Go get her.
315 · Dec 2012
Hey
Robyn Dec 2012
Hey
You said hey
Just a small word
Insignificant to me
Except when you say it
I felt my heart quicken
And heat rise on my face
As I spotted yours
Across the aisle
And you looked at me
Your eyes lit up
And you said hey
To me
And only me
This was written about the same boy whom Me and Only Me is written for. I was in love with him until we took seperate paths and today was the first day I've seen him in almost a year. Please read Me and Only Me for backstory, if you wish.
Robyn Oct 2014
Friends fallen in love
An absurd amount of steps ahead
They think that they're unseen
But behind, I barely block my view
With my white hand

Fingers dancing in between
Interlocked, but not unseen
Wishing I had fingers too
Thinking of nothing but you

Is it indelibly inconvenient of I
To take a tiny
Peek at people
Being bountifully
Happy, how I hate humans

Without you and our fingers locked
Happiness for others blocked
So as my friends will fall in love
I'll turn my gaze to up above
311 · Nov 2015
Untitled
Robyn Nov 2015
Those holy lily petals
Drenched in dew
Open their pale mouths
To the blood
Dripping from steel pipes
Faithful bleeding
The lilies whirl
In a divine breeze
311 · Apr 2017
My Boys
Robyn Apr 2017
There's a little family here.
The three of us.
Perhaps a future,
Or simply just a present.
But forever a gift. This little family -
Of ours.
I could listen to you two noodle on your guitars forever.
311 · Nov 2015
Untitled
Robyn Nov 2015
If I seemed quiet this morning
It's because every time you looked at me
I thought I might explode -
Overwhelmed with every inch of skin and skin and skin . . .
That curve of your forearm
And the smooth expanse of your collarbone
Your rough fingertips and your
Ankles as you rolled your wet jeans
I kept my mouth shut
So none of this **** slipped out my mouth
In the middle of school
311 · Jun 2015
Untitled
Robyn Jun 2015
You built me a fire
And told me that Venus was in the sky
Wrapped me in a blanket -
Rough hands turn soft against my face
Promising to find me a pretty new dress
Then you kissed me -
And still question why I believe I don't deserve you
309 · May 2015
Untitled
Robyn May 2015
I will look left
And I will look right
I will look at yesterday
And I will look at tomorrow
Today is just for you and I
Because we are so in love
309 · Dec 2012
Think Of Me
Robyn Dec 2012
Crack your neck and write it down
Before it breaks it, twists it round
Turn the lights on, pray for peace
Or I'll be given a peice for free

It's coming for you., I think you know
Misery's waiting out in the snow

So lock the door and think of me
And frozen will be Misery
309 · Nov 2012
Have You Noticed?
Robyn Nov 2012
Have you noticed?
Its right in front of your face
Its all around you
Its in your eyes
Its in your heart
Have you noticed?
It doesn't announce itself
It doesn't speak
It doesn't make a sound
But you can feel it
I can feel it
Have you noticed?
Its standing right behind you
Its inching closer, closer
It can smell your hair
It can feel the heat of your body
It reaches out
It is touching you
It is strangling you
Have you noticed?
Its in the crowds
In the masses
In the people who stand close
In the people who are close
Its in you and all you care about
Its everywhere
Have you noticed?
That we're all alone?
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