I used to imagine a future-
and I was genuinely excited to see
exactly what was meant to be.

Now that future has disappeared-
and I’m scared to walk this trail
knowing that everything I try will only fail.

trauma is not
a beautiful thing
i'm not a bird
with broken wings
not a sick puppy
for you to save
not a white daisy
growing over a grave
i'm rotten inside
down to my core
grabbing handfuls
of guts and gore
pushing it back
under my skin
so you will not see
the condition i'm in

Sorry,
I love myself more.