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 May 2020 ranveer joshua
CJ Tims
I am ashamed
At how broken i am.
I apologize
For the amount of stress
I may cause in the midst of your
Efforts of trying to keep me held together.
I apologize
that i continue to fall apart
Before your glue has time to dry.
I apologize
That every time you pick a piece of me up,
Yet another breaks.
I am trying.
You are fixing me slower than i am breaking,
And i am ashamed.
Thank you.
Thank you for not giving up
On a broken piece of nothing.
 May 2020 ranveer joshua
A Poet
Here
 May 2020 ranveer joshua
A Poet
Just know when you are lost
   and have nowhere to go;
       when you whisper,
and not even the echo rings.
      you will feel my love;
  feel my skin, feel my touch.
        and hear back;
   I'm here.

-Here
 May 2020 ranveer joshua
Sketcher
I hug them close, day after day,
And they hate when I start to pull away,
And they pull back tighter and tell me to stay,
And I'm at a loss for words, not knowing what to say,
All of her emotions are on display,
Which makes her glow like a ray,
Of sunshine in early May,
Outshining my soul enshrouded in gray,
Warming me, making me melt like clay,
Deeper into her arms, I pleasantly decay,
Making me feel lighter than a feathers weight,
Making the universe let me know it's all okay.
 May 2020 ranveer joshua
LS
when a poet falls in love with you
you can never die
they will notice the way
you rub your palms and look down
when someone is angry at you
and the way you smirk
as you pull away from a kiss

they will notice how you can't sleep
without your body touching someone else's
how you never crease any pages of books
and how you close your eyes when you dance in your kitchen
with your record player on

they will find all of the words
that they see you as
and turn them into something beautiful

people say you die twice
once when you stop breathing
and when someone says your name
for the last time

if you fall in love with a poet
they will never stop
mentioning your name
you will be alive
for eternity
you're like a papercut
a quick slice with a week long burn  
I wonder what you're like
when you're not pretending
you are making roots in my chest
that burst through my brain
you drive me insane
hidden fragments
so far buried beneath my skin
I wanna go back to the when...
the day I met my sin
I wish I could rid you from my skin
you're imprinted deeper than any ink
a tattoo I can't remove without losing limbs
the memories block me from everything
I wish I could win against them
I wish I could find a way to face them
and bury them somewhere else...
I keep trying to bury them in art
and it just keeps getting darker
distance from those years
makes it even colder still
drowning in shades of purples and blues
pretty like a bruise
 May 2020 ranveer joshua
Slavica
One glance and I couldn't breathe.
A thousand stars set fire to my chest
Orbiting fiercely at the sight of their moon.
Gasping, I seek for a proof that this
isn't yet another cul-de-sac.

Seated and completely unaware
of this thunder inside my chi,
You dance to a carnival of your own
in the world where no streets are known,
yet platforms lead to a world of magic.
(9) 2015
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