i can't write
or think
or breathe
as well as i used to
anymore

my veins are clogged
with unspoken words
and my heart feels numb
with mismatched thoughts
that refuse to escape me

and at two in the morning
i am still wide awake
stifling, within my bitter heart,
the courage-
to put them down on paper

you swallowed my words
inhaled the fragments
and the pieces of me-
you inhaled them,
and i want to be able
to breathe on my own,
to fall asleep
without the heavy weight
of my own terrible thoughts,

but you ran away without
taking them first