Oh my god, what have you done to your hair Please tell me you didn’t buy those clothes with the money I gave you What happened to the you that I use to know? Why are you doing these things to yourself? What have you done to my baby girl. And there we go: that right there is just it.
Your baby girl isn’t the correct terms anymore Don’t you remember when I was little, All the times I ran around looking like I did. You can’t tell me that you thought I’d really grow out of that. When I was just a wee kid I think deep down I knew, I was just unsure of what it meant. When I was only in the fifth grade I had a girlfriend, but we didn’t really know that.
Love, and what does that truly mean? Favoritism, lying, shame, broken- hearted, depression, think on all of that. Do any of the above mean crap to you now? I know I’m not the favorite kid you don’t have to fake it anymore. Face this, we all know that I’m the unwanted, the black sheep, bah bah. Although I will give you that you both help me out a lot.
What is the reasoning behind this you ask, but I shall not give you the answer you want. The reasoning is for me to explain that who I am is who I will always be. Maybe I’ll even improve on the person I know I am supposed to be. I know it’s not either of your faults that I didn’t develop the right parts. I would change the way I am if I could because no it’s not easy, trust me I hate it too. It’s a chemical imbalance they say, something you can be born with.
Why am I sitting here pouring out my heart that I already have on my sleeve? I have no reason to believe that anything could even matter at this point. We all know I will be me and you will disapprove regardless. You say you love me in which I do believe that you both do. My only thing is I feel as if I’m just not what you wanted. Hell I wasn’t even meant to be so maybe that’s why I’m the black sheep. Baahh Baahh cried the poor baby sheep.
Wiping the tears of my face now, I’m sorry dad. I’m sorry, mom. I didn’t mean for this to happen, I hope you don’t mind another son. I know it’s going to be heart breaking and mostly against God as you always say. I know life isn’t meant to be perfect maybe that’s why I’m cursed with this pain. The fear of it all is so scary I wish I could truly change. I hope you know this has nothing to do with my preference in which I’m with. For that sake is another topic we shall not address for now.
With all this out on the table now, I say it’s time to eat, feast on it with however you want my dear parents. To the final tale about how the baby girl became a grown man no one ever knew about.