When I think about my child hood,
I can only think of all the times I was yelled at,
the times I felt I wasn't good enough,
wasn't strong enough,
wasn't smart enough,
I wasn't ****,
I was just a kid.

Back when I was a kid,
I remember having dreams,
seeing demons in them,
killing everyone I ever loved.
Seeing my parents seeing my siblings,
thinking,
I watched you die last night.
What kind of movies did I see?
What sins did I commit to deserve that?
Did I not pray enough?

When I was a kid,
I used to play on the swings,
I used to play with other kids,
I used to be a happy kid.

When I was a kid,
I started being afraid to go to sleep,
because I felt like the monsters under my bed were gonna pull me by the legs.

When I was a kid I remember feeling hatred,
I remember I wanted to be able to **** up everyone I knew in a fight,
that's What made me feel strong,
having the confidence to never lose.

When I was a kid,
I could spell every word I ever heard,
even if it was new.
I remember I was the only one who had to work hard just to get a super citizen award ,
now they just come to me without doing anything at all?

When I was a kid this world made complete sense,
do What your parents tell you and you'll live a Long life.
I was bullied when I was 9,
I rebelled at age 12,
because I decided they don't know What's best for me.
I got in my first fight at 14 because I decided I wanted to be cool.
I got locked up when I was 15 because
I had bigger ***** then I could handle.
I won an award for scholarship & citizenship at age 16 because
I was the most successful.
At this age I was a big kid who still had nightmares.
At age 17 I began to become impatient,
I beat someone even after they were unconscious,
the nightmares still haunt me to this day.
At age 19 I won an award for swim instructor of the year.

And now?
Am I a good enough person for you?
Will you hire me to work for you?
How about you start by accepting my application to Harvard..
Or how about I make things easier for myself and just go to prison
and have a scar for ever person that I stab in the throat.
You talk about your dreams coming true,
only my nightmares have been Real to me.
And now not even the sky can be trusted.
You wanna know the truth?

I don't care much about how bad of a kid I was,
because I am the person I am today;
better than you.
Goodnight society.
And remember, I was just a kid.
I'll never forgive you society,
because I would spend every night looking at the stars thinking I'd never become one.

To come to think of it society,
I don't really want to be one anymore
Because in my nightmares I used to see stars die.
Same way you will.
Goodnight society,
have a good sleep.
I hope the monsters get to you society,
and I hope your nightmares become a reality to you as Well.
Cause I don't deserve it,
I'm just a kid.