That was supposed to be me
I'm supposed to be the one with you right now
Calling you baby and holding your hand
Kissing your cheek and making you laugh

I remember when it was
When you were faithful and you cared
I remember how sweet you were
I remember when you turned

Was it your friends?
Or was I just not good enough?
It's times like this when I miss you
I was tempted with the thought of you and now I'm relapsing

I have a love
I have someone better
But still I sit here in tears
Wishing I could still call you my dear

And I know if he read this, he'd wonder why
Why am I not satisfied?
Well, I am. He's more than enough
I just can't function through this brokenness sometimes

I don't want you back..
I just want to know you
I just want to see your face and still be ok
I don't want you back

It hurts to think about it
It still gives me nightmares sometimes
And still stings my chest
But I'm not giving in

I won't text you no matter how bad I want to
I won't say I love you even though it feels like routine
I won't assume to position of my arms around you
I won't break and do what you want me to

But it's so hard
When I still have your number
Still want to run to you and hold you
Still wish to be your everything

I want to hurt you more though
For all this pain you've caused
And for how you've broken my trust
And left me damaged

I just wish I'd never asked your name
Never given you a hug
Or gave you my number
Never put up with the racist laughter

I stood up for you
You knew I was true
And you used it
Why didn't I see it?

I still lie to myself
Saying if I were to see you today
That you'd want me
You'd still need me

I'm too stupid
Too broken to know
But my heart now belongs to another
And he's putting it back together