I tell my story so often that it seems like I've accepted it. it seems like I'm recovering.
but the truth is, I've told my story so often that I am numb to it.
it no longer feels like my story. I don't feel the fear and the anger the way that I used to. it feels like I'm reading a page out of someone else's biography.
I have learned to convince myself that this trauma belongs to someone who isn't me.
when I talk about it, I speak in a monotone voice. I don't get emotional anymore because I am not in pain. it doesn't hurt to read from a book.
it only hurts if I let myself realize that in this book,