I am afraid of affection
yet I crave it

I want you to stay
but then I want you to go

I'm content one minute
and the next I am angry

I blow up with anger
after taking in so much

My mood swings from highs and lows
every. single. day.

I want to care for me
but then I want you to treat me like trash

I want you to love me
but then I want you to not give a **** about me

I like to be alone
but I don't ever want to be lonely

My sadness is always there
just sometimes milder than others

And don't forget about the
suicidal thoughts

My mind has convinced me
that I am a horrible person

My mind has convinced me
that the people around me hate me

My mind has convinced me
that I am trapped in this hell

What is wrong with me?

Can someone save me?