It's a shock to my system,
For so long I sat here, Lonely, but not alone.
My thoughts were just my own,
only for me to hear.
I sit and wait, talking to no-one for the fear.
That I let them in and and then they **** me up,
Again... again... it's going to happen again....

But here you sit smiling, a strangers big smile,
Yet I feel like I've known you for quite a while.
Only last week did we meet.
As I cleaned and you followed me, not discrete.
I roll my eyes, 'Okay come on,' I say,
Beckoning, waving, welcoming another stray.

Yet you were not who I thought,
The battles in life you have fought,
The depth of things that you see,
You see the whole of me.
You're a Shock to my system.

And now you're under my skin.
That in itself is a win.
You opened up my heart,
Something close to impossible for a start.
Yet you did it, you made me feel
And yet never shall we seal the deal.

Life is cruel, you should know.
If only we had met at a later date,
Maybe after you had more scars to show,
But I fear that I may just be bait.
You're young and naive still,
For me this isn't some cheap thrill.
My heart still yearns for something more,
Yet I'm happy to be here, heart heavy, soul sore.

You just reminded me of what could be,
A weekend of laughing and being seen,
Deep talks, Serious faces, Something Freeing
That's a shock to my system
Those nights, oh hell how I've missed them.
But It just wouldn't work.
It would, you say with a smirk.

But it wont.
Dont.
I know this world,
It is mine.
And I am fine,
Being alone.
Listening to the drones moan
and groan about sitting on their
throne being shown how life is so unfair.
My heart is hard, stone.

A shock to my system you are, where,
Maybe it's the fact you really do care
Maybe it's because I expected something different
Not this. Not you.
A shock to my system you shall be,
Only in short, for a time, but I'll go back to being me.