It doesn’t take long
It doesn’t take much
Simply an idle moment
A single flicker of thought
And it’s on my mind
Hatred
Loathing
Directed within
Then in the pain
The desires start...
For escape
For pleasure
For punishment
For intoxication
For blood
For sin
Maybe I need it
Maybe I deserve it
Maybe I want it
Maybe I crave it...
So I distract myself
Until it’s late enough to sleep
I can retreat to the dark
Behind my eyelids
Where I can’t feel pain