My arms are open
Like my mind

My love is receiving
Like my heart is empty

I am as critical
As I am in search of a pinnacle

Yet I do not chase my quarry

I seem to think she will just fall unto my midst

How lazy
How repugnant
How laughable

Naive

I preach of self reflection

But caught between two mirrors of my own hypocrisy

My vileness reflects back to me.

Blinded by my selfish lust for connection with one not of my disposition

I miss the blinding double standard

I continue to lie.

To spread pseudo-self exploration

Pseudo-self understanding

So my arms may be as open as I say my mind is

And my love may be as receiving as  my heart is empty

But my soul

My soul is as yellow
As my teeth.