why do i crumble fall into pieces of oats and sugar something beautiful in a white bowl, but a mess on the floor when i wake up in an empty house why do i wither like brown leaves under brand new and borrowed boots atop autumn sidewalks when i’m alone, i’m alone, i’m alone it is not enough to eat breakfast however small to wash my hair with coconut milk to not step out into the busy street; i freeze before the ice touches me i do not allow the chance to warm my own hands i lie down, on ***** sheets, and wait for someone anyone anything to awaken me