touchy subjects. hidden mistakes. crashing thunder. My heart, the rain. Plundering down into the mess. Trying to find hope in the dark. Crying in a dark place. trying to fix my mistakes. fixing mistakes by not trying at all is not the way. i tried. but i made it worst. No day is my day. it really isn't i say this not because i am broken or sad. because isn't it true? everyday belongs to the one who made it. HIM. He gave me another chance to live... He gave me another day to breathe! He sees potential in me that he would be willing to give me one more day to live. When we die it's not that God didn't see the potential in us. He gave all of us ample time. Ample time to think. Ample time to reflect. Ample time to Love. Amble time to Hope. Ample time to help others, serve others.
The thing is. I need happiness. A true one. "the one which would last." I would ask. I would want. the one that would stick. but surely. through the storms i have been through. i can rightfully and truthfully tell you, that he gives true joy. One that sticks for eternity. One that is eternal, that will be. One that is just so good. so sweet. so bliss. so free... i want that joy. and you and i would never find it anywhere in any store. True Joy. True peace. Is found in HIM. The source. The ONE. He is the one I want. The thing is...I already have him. Serving him. Has never been in second place in my "blessings" list. It is so beautiful. All of him that I have, would never be in second place of the list.
I want you.
i want you Lord. More than anything... that is the desire i want. i would be willing to go down to my lowest point to find you. forgive me if i blamed you. you know best. you know what is best for me...