am i stoic
for not feeling anything when in the presence of death
for not feeling anything when knowing it was his last breath
am i sick
for my heart not enduring pain
for my heart disconnecting with my brain
is it heroic
for my own body not to go through the stages
for my own body to be trapped in its plentiful cages
will it click
that he's actually gone
that i should be drawn
to it?