and i'm so
afraid to lose you
i find myself
pushing you away
refusing your help
when you try
telling me again
to sit up
straight, and drink
more water, and
do my work
but i'm just
ignoring you again
hurting myself before
time gets a
chance to, or
i somehow break
your beautiful heart

you're the best
thing that's ever
happened to me
so why am
i stopping it
why can't i
control my actions
my ****** up
late night thoughts