I know I've been a gone for a while
But I heard that you're doing just fine
You graduated and got a job and you've been working for some time
It's good to see you looking forward and not behind
I know you never find me crossing your mind
But I would be lying if you didn't cross mine
And from time to time I see some of your pictures online
Summer of 2017 was hard, a time when I put my heart on the line
I tried to forget you and that took a couple months of my time
It looks like you found the love that I was hoping to find
The only you that I love is the one that I create in my mind
You'll never be mine and I know that
But remember the time I came to see you?
I thought it would just be you, but there were a few other people
I know there never was a "We", so there would never be a sequel
I know you were bluffing when you said you cared
Our only real connection were the memories that we shared
I would never try to blame you, I know that much isn’t fair
Not that you care but the stress is really starting to wear
And through these words is when I took our story and I used it
I'm gifted with the curse of honesty and the truth is,
I loved you more than words I just didn't know how to prove it
And I often ask myself if you ever did care
I ponder countless thoughts that's why in my mind is the only time you were ever there
I know we were only friends, but it felt more than just pretend
These past few months have been awfully clear
The real us is what I fear to see
The one where we were only friends and I acted like we were dating
And nowadays our messages go, "Hey, happy something~belated"
And every letter I wrote for you
Deep inside I know you actually hate them
Because I realized that you never felt the same when you read it
You never cared on how much I put into it
But I guess that's why I'm so emasculated
All the love that I've been getting through my phone feels phony
I try to rhyme a couple of words together
To put myself out there so you could understand me
We're in a world full of people and yet I'm still feeling lonely
I lie to myself that there's plenty of fish in the sea
But the sea is full of sharks and you’re the only one for me
And as I'm finding myself drowning while I'm fighting to breathe
I realize that I'm still in love with what I thought we could’ve been