Dear soul,
I think I can hear you cracking.
I'm not used to addressing you in these, but I owe you an apology for everything I've put you through.
Little did I know, through every heartbreak, you cracked a little more.
I was hurting you in the process of healing myself.
The more I tried stitching myself through people's love, the more you yelled out in anger because no one fully understood what and how you felt.
I think the best way to describe it is,
You were drowning slowly; as water filled your lungs & fire burned your skin to char.
I think I've given up.
Honestly, truly, it feels like hope left me stranded in an airport and I don't know who or where to yell, to ask her to come back for me.
Hope gave up on me...when I still haven't.
I think he really did a number on me.
I think, whoever comes next, if he does, is going to have a wall higher than any I've ever built before
I've named the concrete after all that I feel; some bricks mark hate, some mark love, anger, fury, sadness, avalanche, hurricane, thunder, depression, hurt, save me...
I've lost myself in my emotions so much that I've forgotten what it feels like to be happy
He, came up whenever I felt it.
The thought of him always crept through my mind at the thought of happiness, as if I were climbing a cliff or mountain; as soon as I reached the top I couldn't help but stare at the beautiful scene before me, proud; admiring how life brought me here
But now,
He crept onto my thoughts with sadness...
Him and sadness walk hand in hand as if betraying my trust was nothing more than a small bump on the road
Soul,
I'm sorry if I fall to my knees unaware, unsure of how to band your bruises
I haven't given up on you, and maybe not on Love,
I can't give up on love..
I may have given up on him.
Yet you don't understand how,
I've never felt so alive as I do with him.
The world makes sense, if for a little period of time, with him
The stars, they all remind me of him and his eyes and I can't help but lose my sanity looking into them .
Soul, please somehow regain hope.
Knock on her door and ask her nicely to help you, slowly
To show you what it's like to walk through the fire without so much as a hole becoming of you
Soul,
I've wondered what it felt like to never have to depend on anyone,
I guess this is what it feels like;
Complete and utter ****