I'm exhausted. I'm physically and emotionally drained. I find myself looking to nowhere, thinking of nothing, empty and I still don't know where all these tears are coming from. I'm not mad, I don't feel rage, I don't feel anything, nothing but this sharp pain in my chest that comes and goes, and the sudden knot in my throat as the smallest thing reminds me of you. But no, I'm not mad at you. Stop asking me that.
RM. Four years later, after dragging me around, telling me to wait for him, convincing me of not being with anyone else until he was ready and me stupidly believing him. And now he is dating someone else and comes to ask if I'm mad at him.