ACT I
i feel rained on
cracked open
left to bleed
on pure white snow
i feel raw
yet
i am in pain
i am always in pain
i am in so much pain
i cannot tell if it is pain anymore
i am in love

ACT II
is it known that
i would rather bleed
than cry
i have so many secrets
that are not mine
they fill my mouth
fall down my lips
like i've sunk my teeth
into ripened fruit
they are omens
they bite at the skin
on my bones like locust
the blood trickles to my feet
there's so much
there's so much
there's so much
there's so much
im a *******

ACT III
why didn't you try
to replace the rocks
in my chest with flowers
did you know
i was already gone

ACT IV
*** can be sweet
in the back of a car
nervous and tentative
shaking hands against
sweaty palms
moving together
touching
at the same time
we were warm

ACT V
not every living thing
is necessarily alive
i died eight days ago
with my lungs
collapsing
on top of each other
and my nails
digging
into my palms
i shed my skin
like the hair
from last winter
i clawed at the leaches
gnawing at my bones
the hardest part
wasn't dying
it was remembering
that i was ever alive
it was taking a lungful
of air and exhaling
the dust rattling
around in my chest
it was missing the sound
the feeling
of my heart beating
against yours

ACT VI
i once
had someone
with skin
like an angel
she treated me like ****
and smoked far too much
but i guess
i was the one
with the problem
because we broke up
years ago
yet sometimes
i find myself
smoking cigarettes
trying
to taste her again

ACT VII
"please," i begged, my knees scraping the ground, "let me fall out of love."