I am drunk again
My best impression of a middle-aged man cemented to his sofa
His eyes hazy, glassy
staring at the static television
The clink of the glass
A relished sound that makes my stomach churn
The acid dances with anticipation
Adding fuel to the fire
I drink down the amber liquid
Almost too beautiful to waste on thoughts that rebel against the dam I've built inside my head

It's collapsing now
flooding the brain with insane things
Inhumane things
Fears of fingertips losing their grips around my wrists
Of lips losing their reach to mine
Hands having explored every inch of these flaccid limbs
Nothing left to conquer
The conquest long forgotten
To be alone.

The fog of a lover's face lost forever in memories
That will haunt me one chilly evening
A reflection of my worst nightmare
Inebriated and alone