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Jan 2016
two thousand sixteen, who would've thought Id make it this far.. with the mistakes I've made, countless jokes that fell flat, knees bruised, smiles drooped, hearts broken, doors slammed, rocks thrown, bottles dropped, the peachy faces that become apparitions, penny wishes not received, dried up lakes of aspiration.. yet here I am, to meander through another calendar year! Thirty-two years on this ball of wonder, countless toothy grins, held hands and Real deals, too many friends to keep track of, steamy nights and late-night flights, the keyring of heartstrings pulled happily weighs heavy. Treasures plundered, bets wagered and won, risks that panned out, loves that were not lost.. I have achy joints, body pains, interrupted thoughts, grown man stresses, wrinkles in my eyes and in my heart, I get winded biking up hills and notice a separation between myself and the ‘youngsters’, sometimes cynical and sometimes jaded and still.. the wisdom grows, my heart swells bigger than ever, my eyes are clear, the disappointments of the past only add happiness to the successes of my present, the rainy days enjoyed for I know sunlight will once again shine, my heart and brain are no more aligned than before though now they respect each others view instead of battling, the music sounds sweeter, the kiss deeper, the thoughts more profound. I’ve risked it a thousand times and made it through the blizzard, so I’ll risk it a thousand more. The experiences of the years have brought me an inner peace, like a love birds soliloquy. When my frazzled mind needs peace the heart beats, when the heart aches, the mind reminds, “you’ll make it through”. So thanks, for the ones who came and went, held hands and threw fists, laughed and cried, were honest and lied, lived and died. I’ve come to love the inside as much as the outside, the wet as much as the dry, the us as much as the I. It’s a good time be alive, amidst the chaos of an ever evolving world. it’s a celebration of life when you’re around the ones who make you feel and these days, all I seem to do is feel. My family is closer than ever, my friends stand out like flame amongst the rabble of contacts made, my lover is a buzzing bee filling me with honey and sometimes a sting, it’s nothing I can’t handle. It’s nothing I don’t want to handle. If we can keep reminding ourselves of what used to be, we can make it through anything. Appreciate what you have, before it leaves you, death takes everything we love at some point. Don’t let anything else take it before then.
Sean Devlin
Written by
Sean Devlin  M/East Bay, CA
(M/East Bay, CA)   
513
 
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