My heart pounds inside my chest and I can feel my anxiety increasing
I've never been anxious
My two bestfriends are drowning and I don’t know how to swim
Which do I save?
Can I go in after both?
But I can't tread water or even doggy paddle
Wait…I actually have a slight fear of water
But I have to go, I have to try
I can feel the water creeping up my legs
I keep walking steadily, careful not to lose my footing
Got **** it's cold, they must be freezing
I walk faster now, in waste deep
I keep hearing my name in silent cries
They are pleading for me to hurry with their worried eyes
**** where'd she go?
I can’t see her head
I can see his hand
I try to yell "I’m here, I’m here!! I’m coming"
but a tidal wave comes and takes me under
 
I remember she said being around me makes her fearful
Her fears of me made me remember why
I’m flooded with thoughts of my past
Images that can’t be erased no matter how much I’ve changed
No matter how much time has passed
I can’t let myself drown, she needs me
 
Noo! I'm here I can save you this time
I can rescue you, hold you
And your fears of me will be no more
I will be your hero and not your destroyer
 
I resurface and try swimming towards her
But just as my head peeps above the water
A thick cloud of smoke blurs my vision
**** **** ****! I can’t see!
I realize he's trying to get my attention
“Come my way” he's pleading
It looks like he's relaxing on the water
Floating
But it's all a show, I know
He's a sinker
 
That used to be our past time
chilling, relaxing, smoking
But now he is choking on his hobby
**** did I let this happen?
The ominous smoke cloud is hovering above him
spreading in the wind
I know he can’t breathe…
 
I’m overwhelmed and want to yell “Help!”
But nah, I got this
They can't know I'm **** near drowning too
They can’t see the tears running down my face
Thank goodness we are in water
Wait ****...we're in water
Don't panic
Relax.
Breathe.
 
The faster I move, the further into the abyss I go
The harder it is for me to see them
I can no longer hear their cries or see their bodies
 
****. The sun's going down
It’s slowly starting to set.
I have to get to them before night fall
Don't give up.
Don’t
Give
Up.
They're counting on you
 
I turn back...
 
As soon as I reach land I drag my body across the dirt
Ahh yes! Over there!
I get my life boat and return to the water more at ease.
I can do this.
My confidence is back.
I close my eyes and feel their heartbeats traveling through the air
It's like a magnet.
 
Times running out but I will save them
 
Paddle
Faster.
Paddle
Faster!
Tick
Tock
Tick
Tock
 
I don't know if I can reach them before the darkness surrounds them
All I know is I will reach them and pull them aboard
Even if it's dark, at least we will see the light
*Together.