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Far enough but still so close
A pain I earned, the ache I chose
I recognise, but can’t relate  
The circumstance compels this wait
As I stand by, and you become
Recalling some, forgetting some
I feel you, though not hand in hand
I know, I see, I understand!

Mindful of what lies ahead
I want to look behind instead
Or glaze past all uncertainty
And wake up when in clarity

Almond scented, jasmine hued
Chocolate smooth and zest imbued
O caress of sure hands
Full as skies, deep as lands
I may not be with you right now
But we are always synced somehow
The journey of a teardrop
From the rim to when it stops
A trace of love, on sands of time
That renders our lives sublime

Grow, engage, enhance, affect
Shine on, but also, pause, reflect
This is the space, between the two
from no longer...... to not just yet

Arshia.
27.6.19

#morningmeditation
Love, separation, remembrance .
Tere yaad
Aur kuch nahin
Uskay baad....
The raining week has not passed yet
As if, the sky on a cry
Likewise
My head is bursting
As if pain is on gain...
The momentum has arrived
Blueness all over has taken the stance
As if
The conquerer is mourning over the victory...
u find a strange heart,
ask it the cause of existance,
a wondrous expression,
and a reason of being gypsy...
on stalk of dreams,
flowy in windy breeze,
i rely my everything for sake of love,
from every direction comes only a gaze ,
of hatred and deception!!


for sake of love, a dead city,
awakens from the spreading of dust,
sun kisses in its golden color,
the blueness of vast sky,
and life is blown in souls rust,
just for sake of love!!


ur thought, a reflection,
shivers me thorough,
makes me tremble,
like an autumn leaf in season of fall,
i make a call,
for my fragile heart,
to be held and enslaved by the moment of love,
just for sake of love!!


it is falling slowly on island of dark hold,
i need a courage yet, to leave this place,
my eyes glare upon the paths unknown,
silence is its passanger,
and companions are nt sober too,
but,
i am waiting for moon to show me the way,
so i cross the leap,
dive deep,
the oceans of oceans,
in love,
just for sake of llove!!
she is just a chord in an extravagent musical classic,
a stir in the wire, a tune hidden but in bass!
she herself not aware where the music leads her to,
but;
the persistance stay,
and she jumps up and high, low and down the pathways....
and than he appeared;
loveable but bitter, intense but flowy
grasper but leaver, harsh but low key,
he showed her the love she parched for,
but still in bits and pieces;
he is the waterfall that is bound to keep you thirsty,
still u are aware,
there is no way to astray here and there...
he loves her like a winter sun,
cold and perished, warm and so hot that burns.....
"why still there is a void so deep and peristalting
resurfacing now and than "
do the loves of all lovers so unfulfilling
or its just a charisma of love that makes u perished still parched?.......
the hands of his ,melt inside her heart,
reverberation so strong she feels the taste of blood in her mouth....
the world go around in all direction, may be its called a skip of beat
or
may be she is no more in senses to think so deep!!
She was a restless soul!
But i am not saying that she is not calm.
Though,
She stayed unsettled most of the day, while cooking, washing, cleaning, reading and even  kissing me.
But she always melted like the quiet ,blue pleasant sea when i used to take her in my arms.
As if, it was a desire to borrow that energy from me that was deficient in her.
She was the sucker of Love, like a leech, so desperate to **** all blood till last drop.
Like the Sun, that drink all water and convert land to desert.
But i never got tired of her, i kept on giving her, for she was the light of my Home and this Heart!
I know he loves me
So i let him spank me, humiliate me
O heart
With such disdain u said
" so go"
When i said
I am just goin to the door
With the sound of disgust
And i left without any goodbyes.
O that recklessness in me
U see me abusive mouth-ed
Cursing swearing everywhere
U find me pathetic in bed or near door, inside or outside
Or even while passing by
That makes you dream of throwing  ur insanity on me,
On me providing it to u willingly,
But deep down u dnt even know
This cruelty is the byproduct of that void
No love has ever filled in...
And i left , just forever
When with such Disdain, u said
" YOU GO"
It’s unexplainable
The deep rooted seed of love
Oh dear
How will I ever tell you
How I spent days and nights
Kneeded in the dough of love
That magnificent love
Revealed upon me
Bits by bits
And drowned me in its gigantic wave forever.....

Oh the Lover of all lovers
Oh the Lord of all lords
How u created this love
Out of the flesh, that a heart is
And mind a skull contains
How u flourished it so intensely
Insanely,
That whoever opts it
Or gets trapped in it
Looses himself , happily,willingly——-
They say
" states dnt keep the form or shape
They steal u like water does to pebbles"
So here it goes
" i fear ill not stay anymore "

States are like the birds or daffodles or like a type writer or may be its just an un- seen feeling,
What i am supposed to write
Is just not
What i am writing......
See
" how state melts you into something so shapeless"

State is like a man standing under rain
But still counting the water drops
Falling out of no where in vain
And feeling warmth in coldest sane
Lissen
" this what states do to you, numb in speaking what you should to, the only friend you keep, the heart in you"
 Aug 2015 Phosphorimental
MR
My eyes to Slava my seamstress say,

"I'm begging you,
sew me a new skin
here
in your living room
to hold me together now
because I can't seem to anymore...

Dear Slava,
I know you know,
how the thoughts inside me
are crazed,
you've known my childhood days &
it's not me here.
Who's this dead thing in the living room?

I feel the bones inside me,
they're too loose.
You see me falling apart,
these eyes of mine the noose.
Catch me dear friend,
from myself!
I'm begging you,
change this stitch in time
for me?
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