Cold heart
Cold night
Fighting to stay alive
Waters still
Numbed soul
Easy to just let go
One breath
Two steps
Now under the waters depth
Panic stirs
Before relief
Lord Forgive
Angels gone
With the soul as still as the water

The hardest part of your death
Was not the muchness you took away
Rather,
How easily life went on

The sun still rose sharp at 4 like always
The trains rattling away on time
The birds singing the same old songs like yesterday

Strange isn’t it?

Nothing has changed.
Nothing paled now that you’re gone
Life, my life, kept moving forward
It’s steady pace terrifyingly normal

Just a shadow of you seemed to remain
Locked deep within the lost sea of my soul
Your memories, that stupid smile, Forgotten

The world moved on.

Unchanged by the suddenness of your passing
Unphased by the hole you left behind
In my shockingly unstable soul
A place you once called home

A home now dusty and empty
In an endless eternity of waiting
Waiting…
Forever waiting….

Just between us,
shadows,
you whisper
sounds of regret,
the same way my tongue
marinates in vowels,
and 'my sorry'
lies as heavy and hollow
in my Chevy trunk
among the thousands
that I have kept.