Don't hold me to what I say at 3 am I'm just trying to find a kindred soul.

Forgive me my sins

Little bird

For i have loved and disobeyed

The long wind howls

As the old man scowls

At the tear stained land

The ancient sand will overtake this world

And I now have it in my hold

For this is what  the beggar foretold

I have been caught in my deeds

And the seeds of hate and angst  spreads

Your life is now hanging on the frailest of threads

So forgive me my sins

Little bird

Have you ever heard of an ending so sweet

With love by your side as you become obsolete .

I walked upstairs. the wooden floor boards screeched. My knees were scratched from the cobblestone roads I ventured in my dreams. The same unforgiving feeling crept into my soul and inhibited my body, I could feel it brewing deep within myself slowly spreading towards my finger tips. Almost tangible but not at all, like a thought that got lost between your brain and mouth, yet it still lingers in the twinkle of your eyes. Helpless and angry but most of all alone, no one to blame but your own stupidity. Tonight when I came home there was no one, no one was waiting for me in the door way. The bedroom looks somehow colder. A mute blue room. Tonight when I came home the walls heard my frustrated sighs. They will keep them for all eternity. Tonight I'll open the windows and let the summer breeze explore the dark corridors, I'll play our song and close my eyes. I'll light up my cigarette and lie on the unmade bed. My tired eyes will see the smoke morph into visions of us dancing, laughing, obnoxiously singing for all the neighbors to hear. However for now I think I'll just sit on the top step of the wooden staircase and wait. For tonight the moon had changed and maybe so did your decision.

My eyes were closed when you left, so suddenly that the pain settled in as the shards of my heart nestled into my throat. Did you notice the difference in our smiles smothered by pretense and bitterness. Opting out was the decision only one can make leaving the other hanging oh the scars that bloomed on my body was not for you but a sobering reminder of me. You who never was at all created a universe that managed to implode within me. The us that never was left traces in my soul that don't fade. You could have been the one that changed it all and yet all you were just another faceless man. Someone I dreamt about walking in the sand finding foreign lands and yet you are not that one. You are no one. I closed my eyes when you left. That way your steps were untraceable. When I opened my eyes you had dissolved into thin air and thus became nothing.

How fickle the heart
How fleeting the soul
The darkness within will always take hold
Begone I cried out
My daemons all snickered
In the glummest hour the candle light flickered
What trickery is this
These scars on my hands
I feel so heavy
I'm bound to this land
Round in circles my memories go
As the candle flickers so do my woes.

I wonder if you told her she looks beautiful tonight
I wonder if she revoked your truth
and you ended up in a fight
I wonder how strong your feelings are
And how weak is her heart
I wonder if she ever thinks of him at night
I wonder if her eyes shut tight
From the guilt of remembering his name
I wonder who is too blame in this insane game of trial and error
I wonder if she clutches your hand when she is scared at night
I wonder if you're willing to fight for her instead of allowing her to fade away
I wonder if you remeber the man you used to be
Can you see glimpses of me ?
I wonder if you had decided to stay
What may have been?
Or do you lie awake next to her to hear your heartbeats sync
During the night and all through the day I wonder
if l will ever be okay

You were the prospect of tomorrow.
Now you're a shadow of the past.