I see him
The one that I truly love

He starts to walk to me and leans in to give me a kiss
But he stops

He told me that he didn’t love me
He loves someone else

Someone more fair and witty than I
Someone with good lucks and less clumsy than I

So here I sit, crying because my heart is broken
Here I sit, waiting for Him to heal my heart

Why is it
that I
feel closest to you
when this
simple timestamp
appears before me?

Can you explain this digital phenomenon
that verifies your existence?

That you do
indeed
breath and eat and dream;
that radio silence
is
the most empty sound of all?

Why is it
that I
feel closest to you
when this
simple timestamp
appears before me?

Have you ever liked someone so much you regret meeting them?

i locked the door,
but even i do not know how to reopen it.

i need a reason to believe my
"friends"
haven't given up on me.
i need a reason to understand why i am so unlikable
i need a reason to know why i'm always the last pick
with better
kinder
prettier
people always climbing over me.
i need a reason to understand where my qualifications for being considered "worth it"
went wrong.
i need a reason for the endless feelings of loneliness and isolation.
i need some solid substantial evidence that can help explain why the second i start trusting someone
they seem to forget about me.

is this paranoia?
is this a normal situation my mind is altering?

is this reality?
is this the way it has to be?
with being last and being left out and simply not being enough to be
included?
if this is the way it is going to be,
please just give me a reason why.

- a.g.