i want to say i love you

but i keep it to goodnight

because love means

f
   a
    l
       l
         i
           n
               g

and you're afraid of heights

*(well you said so)

you dont know pain
unless you're staring at a mirror
hair in your face
tears coming out from your eyes
thinking about giving up,
maybe a few fresh cuts.
and you're begging yourself to stay strong
to not give up

have you ever begged yourself?

*I did.

you asked me
"what's wrong"
i smiled and i said
"nothing"

i turned around and whispered
**"everything"

stuck
i wanna call it stuck
because even though it ****
here i am giving a ****
i shouldn't be crying
i shouldn't be caring
is this a game
that would make me lame
in where you'll say you like me
and then whisper
Atleast you think i do
Oh gosh, i badly want to press a button
that says undo
if only i could
i probably would.
you are pretentious
i though you were precious
foods  are delicious
thank god, it takes away the anxious.

don't promise if you won't do
don't act like you have a clue
don't talk if you're not gonna listen
don't walk if you start running
don't go get a *rope
don't ever lose *hope

this is not a perfect world, so why lie?
but just one thing, you have to *carry on and try.

you can be sweet
then later make a mess

you treat me like ****
but i keep on coming back

i hate that i love you
but one thing is true
no matter how mean you are
i'll always love you

maybe i'll be smarter someday
and just walk away

until that day come
i'll continue to say

i hate the way i love you

i have this urge to cut somewhere in the artroom, someone saw me and said
"dont you know that can **** you?"

i was shocked but all i can say was "i know."

"then why are you doing it? you could die."

i gave him a blank look and said

"maybe, thats the point."

i was so depressed the past few days, and he talked to me, i started feeling this weird butterflies again, tell me, why does he affect me like this?
now this is what im talking about, everyone is like, hes not the right guy for you. Can i just fall for him, and can he just fall for me too? i mean, thats better right? i will love him as much as he loves her, because right now, hes just proving me that he really is the wrong guy, but i cant help it.

im not really running away from you,
infact im slowly walking,
but it kills me seeing you
not caring at all.

you know why some people are mean?

because thats a way for them to not be heart broken.

to act like they dont have one.

why?
why do people fall for the wrong guy?
i mean can't we just fall in love with a guy whos always gonna be there for us?
the guy who wont leave us.
why do we need to fall for the wrong one?
like, we could just like someone and that someone will like us back,
and thats it.
Everybody happy.
like you won't leave each other.
why do we have to call them the wrong ones if we can fall for them and make them the right one, right?
and just keep on falling in love with them
over and over again.
thats better right? well atleast for me.