You said you loved me.
You said I was the only one.
You said your heart belongs to me.
But you lied you took my heart and, smashed it to pieces before my eyes.
But I sometimes smile to myself
I will allways.
Love.
You.

I'm not entirely proud of all the things I have done,
nor am I satisfied with how things have turned out.
While I may have had relative misfortune,
there are countless people who have had it worse.
Therefore, who am I to say I am sad?
But the logic of saying you can't be sad because some have it worse,
is like saying others can't be happy because some have it better.
Plenty of things have happened to me,
that I wouldn't wish on my enemies.
I couldn't.
Because I know the pain that comes with.
Because I know the truth.
Because wildest imaginations cannot explain the agony.
So I had to find the reason.
Of all people in the entire world,
why me?
I never worked hard enough.
I was never smart enough.
I was never strong enough.
I was never skilled enough.
I was never good enough.
At least that was what I was told.
Being told this, over and over
you start to believe it.
You live it.
To the point where I constantly am confused
when good things happen.
When good people are nice.
I struggle to grasp when these people
say that they like me
that they value me.
I struggle to grasp that
because I don't like me.
I don't get how people could.
The torment I experience
at this point in my life is self inflicted.
Because I won't let anyone have the chance
to get close.
Its too much.
Comfort is foreign.
Relaxed is nonexistent.
Always in a state of peril.
People deserve comfort and relaxation.
But my life has told me, that I do not qualify.
I hate that.
I wish things were different.
I wish I was someone else.
But then someone would have to be me.
And that's not fair to them.
So I'll take this backpack of suffering,
knowing someone better than me
doesn't need to be weighed down.

We were beautiful,
Beautiful as summer days,
once kept us safe in loves tender haze,
As we walked and we talked hands held so tight,
In virtual silence, we talk, for together we needed not spoken word,
Together once, we fell into bed, became enlightened,
By one another,
Bronze bodies laid,
but that was of late,
much too late,
You were awesome,
you still are,
you were the raspberry that you blew,
darling, you are my raspberry fool.
And still I love,
I love you still,
I  show no emotion,
For any,
No-one since you crossed my heart.
My cherished raspberry fool,
Your pips are stuck in my teeth,
And your image in the depths of my dreams,
I wish that I was there,
but I'm not.
One day soon maybe,
the God's of love will let him reconsider,
our tenable position,
time spent holding me close,
Once more,
Our starring roles, recreated!

(C) Livvi

You don't always have to be alone to be lonely.

Let the beat of our besotted hearts
bring rhythm to our knotted limbs
with no one here to tell us now
where I should end and you begin.

serengeti sunset
the dance of
life and death
pauses to
see her reflection
in mirrored
blue sky
thus catch
her breath
shall hear the
sound made by
sweet blue rain
from the stormlight

No rush, lets take it slow let the day go by we dont have anywhere to go.On our backs looking up at the sun, it shines so brightly I dont ever want to let this moment go.but if I'm with you, everyday lets take it nice an slow.

Do not try running from the past
That will be too slow
Instead board a train heading for the future
While having brunch with the present