i crave something different
this time around
i'm not searching for answers
or creating the questions
my shell has eroded
plain to see
leaving a pale-skinned lamb
to bake in the sun
whether its 8 in the morning
or a quarter to 2
the mornings are vacant
without you
while i might be hiding
my craving for touch
at least i'm not hiding
a closeted lust for everyone
who shows you fabricated trust

words and whispers
are just the same
im numb again
like the number
on the scale
that rises and falls periodically
i will never be enough

I am hungry
and no longer safe
the feeling lingers
in the stomach
the habit is in the heart
wanting more than anything
just to be loved
the inhale and exhale
is never enough
i'm holding my breath
i'm simply selfishness
hollow-rib-cage-rattling
desire

i wonder if you're hungry
for what I crave
dangerous love that feels out of place

you spent your whole life
wishing you were a butterfly
when you're simply a caterpillar
who has a lot of growing up to do

a walking poem,
that's what you are
complete with your eyes
that form sentences
beneath my skin
your words crawl through my spine
and lie on my wrist
i think you're forgetting
i'm good at this.
i can see your metaphors
when your bones stay still
and i can feel your similes,
as deep as the ocean
all i've got to do is swim
the water's never clear
and it's never very warm
but i'd swim across the sea
just so we could be free
if words are your vice
then write me an ending
our love was **always worth defending

im numb to the way
my heart spins around
you
i forgot the feeling of butterflies
and the heaviness inside your eyes
an eager glance into your heart
is just enough for me to fall apart
and this isn't right
this filthy life
where ghosts hide
their wasted lives
you're what makes me feel alive

how do you bury sunshine
and keep it in a crowded box
it's just a shell
but it's enough for the wind to blow
and the cold rain to fall
a reminder,
as if we needed one,
that even sunshine dies,
after all