everlasting pressure and tension
a house never reading between the lines
where every stranger becomes an idiot
superficial minds

trying to bear the stress
but lying awake feels like forever
tired of this room where the light is always shining bright
see the little window, all night

only because pointless *******
the senseless negativity all day
some are maybe sensitive and notice
others don't, find it okay



my little girl
now know you have never been a stranger
stop blaming yourself for the unknown ignorant
not knowing to deal with

fighting back
now i try to stand
why aren't you just there, mom and dad
where have you mentally been back then

wolken voor de sterrenregen
als zij, houden van geheimen
een plek om te schuilen
bij zij die gelukkig zijn
geluk op een groot podium

zwemmend in een zwart meer
de stilte houdt van me
de wereld houdt me
in zijn greep
een pijn
niemand zal begrijpen
accepteer maar
meisje
zoekt vervanging
vindt vervanging
van leegte
waar ik wil drijven
op het zwarte meer
mijn rug slechts een trap
voor zij die er in zijn gevallen
maar laat mij zinken
laat me maar
in deze koude nacht
vol onbegrip, steken van leven
wachtend op een ladder naar de maan
mijn hand reikt uit

how could i be so stupid
how could i be so blind

two years ago
you already told me, here

the doubts for your love
your love for me

now you've been just another lie to me
just someone using the best of me

now then go ahead with the woman
move with her to... and be happy

but don't tell me excuses
you did not know, did not want to hurt me

you did

with the silence, anger you left behind
your mask is still aching inside of me

i wish to eliminate the layers
remove all that's now, still not clear

still not knowing that one day
i'll be done with this burden to bear

a little bird sings
in the white moonlight
its tree branch swings
and the singer at night
turns into stone
then dust

the world suffocating
in this dark substance
could it be a must
of all that once was beautiful
turns into anger
sad lust

too much anger
where does it come from
while i wish to see love and peace

i still have to raise my children
the mother me is crying with them
is there anybody out there
a lack of someone being there for me
my friends, my own family
don't leave me here so lonely

but why should i feel like this all the time
wishing someone could gimme a sign
when it won't ever happen anyway

now my body tells me to stop the flow of anger
no more devils, inside of me
to avoid a room with broken furniture
i'll tell them how i want it, but i'll take it easy
(for i don't give a ****)
i'll think over my feelings, i'll feel my feelings
(for these belong to me)
i'll be my happy, but i won't become needy
(for i deserve a life to live)

because i don't need you
won't even need my mom
for i'll be my own, i be me

embrace the cries

stuck in a prison of pain
my hands touch the bars
a little cage i find myself in
i hear something far away
****** sound of laugther
****** lies in my face
all the people seem so happy
you and your new lover
it all made me sick and tired
now the questions arise
guess my time has expired
my hands touch my ears
this life is such a dead end
what have i done wrong
why do i have to be strong
in a prison i don't belong
i crawl back and think it all over again
no more writing about you on the wall
no more other people to break my fall
the gates of hell are opened for me
maybe they want me back
maybe they want me just to see
the me has been taken from me
and i should go in to find
i embrace the darkness
i cry to clear my mind
in the prison of pain
it are my own hands that bind