Hopeless nights of our lungs giving out. Last July, you promised this would all stop.

But here I am. Grasping the bed sheets wondering where you are? Do you want to be with me?

When you're alone you call me and kiss my face. I give in again.

But tonight is different the despair had won this race of lies. I'm tired of competing when I'm never gonna qualify.

It was snowing that day cold and damp
As she sat longing for some sun.
The days passed much like the snowflakes, no one looking like the other.
Simply fleeting by, trailing along with the wind.
The bench which she sat on was her only place of solace.
A place where she could get away- to clear her mind,
But there's a blizzard in her mind as well, covering all of her precious thoughts.
She fights through the storm, but sometimes it's too much to handle,
So she gets up and starts to walk, feet sloshing in the snow as she goes
Slowly walking back to the same life she can't break free from
Because there's always a blizzard on her mind.
She longs for her life to be as free as the snowflakes passing by her,
But the flurries just don't come that often,
**And her solace can only be found on a bench.

in the end i always get left
it's always the same, no matter which boy it is
i use the photos we took together as coasters
and the old t shirts to soak up spilled moscato
i go out a little bit more and work a little bit less
then i write a poem
and do it all again

Forcing a smile, but
All you can manage is your
Cheap, laughable smirk.

the seasons have changed
we are back in touch and its like last summer all over again
the electricity
the euphoria
we are at the base of the tree that watched you grow last year
you are smoking your first cigarette and crying
we are swimming in the river, taking polaroid photos of each other in a thunderstorm
we are at our favorite coffee shop, despite the fact that you don't even like coffee
but
there is still an ocean between us
and now i have different things i am remembering
she is in your bed, sleeping in your arms
she is posting pictures of you kissing in the park and i am crying so hard that i go to the bathroom because i think i might throw up
you are flirting with her at a bar while i am boarding the plane to come see you
you are lying and compromising the times we had together just so she feels comfortable
and now
you tell me you love me even though you abadoned every single one of our memories
you are choosing her over me
again
and it is breaking my heart every single time that i inhale
although im no longer sorry about the front bottoms
i am sorry that i told you that i needed you
and you still picked her because it was more convenient
i am sorry you are realizing now that maybe you need me too

You're a dime--
But not in the way that you think.

You're the dime that he
Leaves on the table because he
Doesn't feel the need
To pick you up when given spare change.

You're the dime that he
Puts in a machine with no hesitation
Because he just had a craving
And you're helping him to get his fix.

You're the dime that he
Digs in his pockets for so that
He can call home but he
Doesn't find you because you aren't there.

You're the dime that he
Lost because he
Never paid
Attention to you until he couldn't find you.

You're the dime that someone else
Found and picked up
Off the street and
Actually wants and appreciates.

You are a dime.

I used to hate goodbyes,
So every time we parted
We said,
"See you tomorrow"
"See you later"
"See you whenever"
Because it left the hope
Of seeing each other again.
I've started saying my goodbyes now
And I think it's because
When you left me
I really felt what goodbye was
Supposed to feel like.
I didn't like it.
I still don't.
But now that I know
What never seeing you again
Feels like,
It is a lot easier to say
Goodbye to everyone else.

I thought you would make
Me beautiful, but you just
Thrived on my slow death.

I really hope the
Unseemly image of me
Burns right through your soul.