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amanda
amand
aman
ama
am
i
allowed to admit
these letters
are losing meaning
everyday?
some days
i don't want to be me

some days i don't want
to be a person
I am waiting for your smiles
and sitting down for your voice.
I have found your door after
the journey of miles and miles.

If you receive me this morning
I'll melt in you till the evening
I'll make you never forget me
after my loving touch today.

When you will come here and see me
I'm lying down on the front door
You'll just pull me up to adore
and you won't stop hugging me.

I wish you will be here so soon
to make my eyes wonder
I'd draw a beautiful afternoon
along with you by the blue river!
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I wanted to say so much,
so many words,
say them out loud,
tell you everything.

But I couldn't make my mouth speak.

I just sat there,
in front of you,
numb,
quietly.

There was so much to say,
but all I could get out was “sorry”
after you talked all the time because I didn't say anything.

I'm sorry.
I'm so sorry and so much more.
So much more
but I just can't tell you that.
The emptiness inside his chest
It felt like a vacuum
Like everything would be forced to fall towards it,
in an attempt to fill the void.

And indeed the emptiness,
the vacuum
****** in everything
in an attempt to disappear.

It ****** in the world around him
Until it collapsed under its weight
into a black hole,
until he couldn't carry the weight of the world anymore
and collapsed under the weight.

It ****** in his soul,
until he disappeared.

The emptiness inside his chest,
It was so consuming,
so heavy,
so full,
It left no space to breathe.
Emptiness is basically the opposite of what it implies.
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