Higher than a cloud, I'm never coming down.
I like the was it feel up here.
All the pain is numb, the voices in my head remind me of what I've become.
All the painful symphony's dead.

I cant do this.
I don't know how to go on.
Daddy please come back.
I'm really not that strong.

It's two am.
Why can't I sleep?
Why am I wide awake?
Oh wait I know;
Because sleep and I aren't friends anymore.
My mind races when I try to rest.
The voices don't shut up.
I can't close my eyes.
I can't escape the nightmare.
The same **** one.
Daddy's in it.
He's saying somethig,
what daddy I can't hear
HELP
Im coming daddy hold on
Help me please
But I can never reach him in time.
Something always holds me back.
I scream and cry and;

wake up Bree, *** it's okay. It was just a dream. Go back to sleep

But it wasn't just a dream and it's not that easy to just go back to sleep.

And that's why at two am I'm still wide awake.

I am 100%

So completely

Utterly

And without a single doubt,

In love with you

Every single part and ounce of me longs for you.

**I don't know if I've ever wanted anyone more than I want you

Can't you leave me alone?
Can't you see I've had enough?
If you haven't noticed, my life if kinda rough.  
Do you like to harass me?
Do you enjoy giving me a hard time?
*Does it make you feel good knowing you're the reason I'll be dead in no time

I fell in love with the little things really.
I fell in love with the way you say my name, the way it rolls off your tongue like smooth velvet.
I fell in love with the way you laughed,
And also with the way you made me laugh once again.
I fell in love with your eyes, the deep blue reminding me of the ocean; my favorite place.
I fell in love with your honesty,
You're broken and not afraid to let it show.
I fell in love with the way I feel so safe in your arms,
When you let me cry and you kiss my forehead telling me it'll be alright.
I fell in love with our car rides,
Singing along to every song we knew; our voices blending in perfect harmony.
I fell in love with the way you complete me,
Finally filling the emptiness I've felt for so long.
I fell in love with your honesty,
Never keeping a single detail from me.
I fell in love with evey ounce of you.
I fell in love with the way you love me too.

For so long
And especially this year, I've been forcing laughter.
Faking smiles.
But then you came along and changed everything.
When our eyes lock I get butterflies in my tummy.
When your name lights up my phone I swear my smile could light up the night sky.
I can't even control it,
It just overflows.
You know how in the movies there's always that one girl?
You know the one smiling like an idiot walking by herself through the halls?
You've turned me into that idiot girl.
And the scary part is,
*I'm beginning to like it

Like maybe speed.
That way I could run far away
So you aren't the one that has to find me

I'm sorry I'm not thin enough
I'm sorry I'm such a ***** up
I'm sorry that I don't always have the best attitude
I'm sorry I'm such a mess
I'm sorry I couldn't make you happy.
But don't worry.
I'll be gone soon.
I won't be in your way anymore

*Im sorry I couldn't hold on

I wish to hold love in my hands
To feel its warmth as a tangible thing

I wish to radiate adoration
To those who need it more than me

I wish to be stronger than a tsunami
Being a tide of joy

I wish to be washed in safety
To be bound to earth

I wish to hold that hand forever
To call it my own

I wish to caress your skin always
To keep you close

I wish to carry our love in my hands
To know its truth