fill the world with love fill the world with peace.
take away the wars let the troubles cease
spread it all around to each and every race
let us live as one in each and every place.

let the world be happy for each and everyone
make the future bright make the love go on
share it with the world each and everyday
to make the world worth living in its the only way

Helen sat next to me
on the grass
outside Banks House

I was attempting to open
a bottle of lemonade

can I have a drop?
she asked

sure
once I get the thing open
I said

she looked around her
then over at the coal wharf
where coal men
were filling up
their trucks and wagons
with sacks of coal

I unscrewed
the lid of the bottle
and handed her
the bottle

she took it
with both hands
and took a swig
then another

pearls of sweat
sat on her forehead
her brown wet hair stuck
to her face at the sides
it was a hot summer

here
she said
handing me the bottle

I wiped the top
and took a swig

that's better
she said
I was really thirsty
my tongue felt
like the bottom
of my baby sister's pram

I handed her the bottle again
she wiped the top
and swigged some more

I watched her
as she drank
then looked away
and looked at the flat's
behind us
no curtains moved
no curtain twitchers
looked at us

she gave me back the bottle
and I ******* the lid
back on
and placed it
beside me on the grass

I’m getting
a new school dress tomorrow
she said
Mum said I’ve outgrown
my old one

I gazed at her
she was wearing
a tomato stained white blouse
and grey pleated skirt
white ankle socks
and black scuffed shoes

I may get new blouses
if they can afford them
otherwise I’ll have to wear
those second hand ones
my mum got
from a jumble sale
not that I mind of course
but new ones
are always better

I took a white paper bag
from the grass
and said
want a bun?

is it fresh?

this morning's

OK thank you
and she took a bun
from the bag
and ate into it

I took one
and ate it
piece by piece
picking out the currants

I need shoes too
she said
but don't expect
to get them yet awhile
will have to
make them do

a horse drawn
coal wagon
moved out
of the coal wharf

Helen still talked

I watched the horse
trotting along the road
he didn't seem strained
pulling the heavy load.

I cannot eat without a friend
and I haven't showered in days.
That is why I write, I guess.

I do not brush my teeth anymore but
when we were staying over
I brushed them two times a day.
That is how I write;
so human.

My tongue tastes stale and my scalp
feels like a bathroom rug.
I've never listened to music this much before.
I did not like sounds. Still don't.
I hope my ears would bleed so I could write about it.

Oh I only can write;
so human.

I do not read. Do not speak nor hear.
That is why I write.

There were days when I could not write.
There will be more.
More. More. I hope it's not today.

I only can write!

I just cant sleep
My mind is locked up
Let me drown these feelings
With just one more cup
My breath becomes ragged
Tears pour down my face
Please just let me get out of this place
I want nothing more
But your love and embrace
But i cant let myself beg
With another door in my face
And tomorrow the routine is back
Every word hitting my heart
With the sharp ***** of a tack
But i cant throw this away
Too much time has gone by
Too many secrets shared

I never should have said hi.

Alone a man lies
In the grace of angels
Breath swells like tide
On alabaster beach

What possessed him  
To climb to heaven
What arrogance of man
To count among irreproach

A silver light shines
All around him
He touches
But does not hold

A tremble falls on him
A fire erupts in the blood
Man is not meant to hear
The melody of heaven's song

Faith guides not the wicked
His heart wants only love
Fore selfish sycophantic lust
Did bring him to this place

He climbed his way to heaven
Alone the man, he lies
In grace of sleeping angels
He fell a thousand times

What is a thing but a thing
What is it worth
What will it bring?

What is a pen but a pen
What will it write
And to what end?

What do you do
When you hold in your hand
not what you thought
But a totem, a memory
A world you forgot?

Who are you if not a world
What is in a soul,
If not an existence undefinable
What if you forget to be a world?

What if growing is losing
What if changing is dying
What if when we are choosing
We're really just lying
Convincing ourselves that each day is new?

What is a pen
If it never writes its name
Where is it from
How is it here?

If you never give it a name
Has it been anywhere
If a thought, a feeling, a life
Was forgotten
Has it died
How many times have I died?

What is there to fear in death
If we do it every hour
On the hour
What is there to fear in ourselves?
We are monsters
Great cinema horrors
Walking Dead

We search for love like it's some priceless treasure to be found. Even though we know it's a devil that will eat our heart alive.