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Who am I?

I am not the powder on my face
I am not my clothes sweeping grace
I am the voice that flows from my mouth
I am the warm winds from the south

I am not just skin and bones
I am more than that to behold
I am the flower that tries to break through the snow
I am the sunshine that glows

I am not my legs and arms
I am much more than their charms
Even when my legs grow week
The spirit that made them run will still speak

I am more than a physical thing
I am more than a human being
I am a soul that's free and wild
I have the love of a child.
my heart,
may you always be free.
my heart,
may you never be afraid.
my heart,
may you be wild.
my heart,
may you never spend your days
locked in a cage of fear.
my heart,
may you fall in love with beauty,
the beauty that lies in bravery,
the beauty that lives in joy.
my heart,
may you never be afraid to drown
in the ocean of love.
i want to lose myself in
your gaze and forget all
that is around me and i
want You to flood my
thoughts and i want You
to be the air that i breathe
and i want You to be the
place i walk to and the path
i walk on and i want You to
be the reason why my heart
beats and i just want You
to be enough.
(Rock Lake, Canada)

In this country there is neither measure nor balance
To redress the dominance of rocks and woods,
The passage, say, of these man-shaming clouds.

No gesture of yours or mine could catch their attention,
No word make them carry water or fire the kindling
Like local trolls in the spell of a superior being.

Well, one wearies of the Public Gardens:  one wants a vacation
Where trees and clouds and animals pay no notice;
Away from the labeled elms, the tame tea-roses.

It took three days driving north to find a cloud
The polite skies over Boston couldn't possibly accommodate.
Here on the last frontier of the big, brash spirit

The horizons are too far off to be chummy as uncles;
The colors assert themselves with a sort of vengeance.
Each day concludes in a huge splurge of vermilions

And night arrives in one gigantic step.
It is comfortable, for a change, to mean so little.
These rocks offer no purchase to herbage or people:

They are conceiving a dynasty of perfect cold.
In a month we'll wonder what plates and forks are for.
I lean to you, numb as a fossil.  Tell me I'm here.

The Pilgrims and Indians might never have happened.
Planets pulse in the lake like bright amoebas;
The pines blot our voices up in their lightest sighs.

Around our tent the old simplicities sough
Sleepily as Lethe, trying to get in.
We'll wake blank-brained as water in the dawn.
The flowing of yonder stream
Makes me begin to daydream.
Little waterfalls so swift
And my mind begins to drift.

Water so fresh and so cold
Nearby Beech tree standing bold.
Beside the stream I daydream
Whom could with me sit by stream?

Evening does too soon come
And soon sets that golden sun,
On a day so carelessly
Dreaming dreams so happily.

Lost in thought by yonder stream
I see rays of golden gleam.
Whom could with me sit and dream
Lost in thought by yonder stream?*

Тадеус
© Тадеус 8-17-2014
Все права защищены.
Opening my eyes
kills me on the inside
and it's my strength
to part my lips wide
that lurches me forward.

Opening my eyes
is like opening a dam
on the edge of a waterfall
but without any
water or life.

And for what?
*I. Don't. Know.
I remember when you told me to
let it go
The words slipped out of your mouth but never did you let pride slip out of your fingers
I know, because every syllable still stings
The surface of my heart.

Mr. Building, you let go.
Allow the wind to blow against your hair and
create wrinkles on your clothing
But never let it
Knock the dreams right out of you
Because
I believe in them and never will I
Even stutter those words to you
le-le-let
Me take your hand and help you carry those burdens
Don't ever drop your ceramic hope,
Cling on to your glassy aspirations because dreams
Are made of fine china
So precious
So fragile
So so so beautiful
Please don't let  your chin fall to the ground.
Lift yourself up,
Because the world deserves to see
How tall He's built you
But prove to them
That when the earthquake comes,
You height's got nothing on your
Foundations.
And if telling me to let it go
Is to break me back into concrete,
Powder,
Cement,
Then by all means demolish these
Stories and hammer through these
Crevasses
Because every broken window
Is worth seeing you succeed.
It'll hurt me to the very ground,
But your standing tall
Will help me recover.

I remember when you told me to
let it go
Your breath smelled of coffee.
I can tell you've had a rough night.

And maybe
Just maybe
you spent
those sleepless nights
Deciding whether you should
Let it go, too.
It's late and my mind only knows how to speak in metaphor.
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